Food jokes
You want a pizza from me!!!!
Pizzaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!
Did you hear about the Pillsbury Dough Boy? He died of a yeast infection.
What does milk and a kid with cancer have in common?
An expiration date.
A mushroom walked into a pub.
He asked the bartender to give him a beer.
The bartender said, "I can't, you'll get too rowdy."
The mushroom then said, "Oh come on! When I drink, I'm a fun guy!"
Q. What do you get if you put hot water down a rabbit hole?
A. Hot cross bunnies!
What did the chocolate dentist say to the other chocolate dentist? Did you "chip" a tooth?
What is a vampire’s favorite fruit?
A nectarine.
What do you call a herd of cows masturbating?
Beef strokin' off.
What can you tell [is] the difference between Stephen Hawking and a carrot?
Nothing.
Why do basketball players like cookies? Because they can dunk them!
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite food? Microchips.
I don’t have enough money to buy cheese, could you provolone me some money?
Two cannibals are eating a clown. One of them turned to the other and said, "Does this taste funny to you?"
What happens when you see corn looking at you in your window?
A corn stalk!
What does Vin Diesel eat for dinner?
Survival Guilt.
Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he felt crummy!
What does a pizza delivery man and a gynecologist have in common?
They can both smell it, but they can’t eat it.
What was the chip doing at the hairdressers?
It was getting a crinkle cut.
Are you an egg, because you crack me up?