Food jokes
Your mom is so stupid that she thought LGBTQ was a sandwich.
What do strippers and butter have in common?
Both spread for bread.
Vegan is actually an old Indian word for "bad hunter."
Why can't a Muslim woman give head to an American cop?
She doesn't eat pigs.
My wife said she wanted steamed vegetables with her steak, so I put her father in the hot tub.
Why do physically disabled gay men like performing blowjobs on well-endowed, abled-bodied gay men?
Because physically disabled gay men prefer eating pepperoni than eating sausage links for dinner 🍽
What do you call a guy who loves to eat out a hoe's pussy?
Answer: a Carnivwhore.
What do you get if you cross a loaf of bread with a vagina?
A yeast infection.
Yo momma is so ugly, she made my Happy Meal cry.
When I was a kid, my father would tell me that the black Santa Claus was coming to our house for Christmas. So, instead of putting out cookies and milk, we would put out cornbread and purple Kool-Aid.
Why does Miss Piggy douche with honey?
Because Kermit likes his pork sweet and sour.
What does a squirrel eat? Deez Nutz in their mouth.
What did Donald Trump serve Justin Trudeau at the state dinner?
Poutine in traditional Russian dressing!
What's the difference between a cop and bacon?
Bacon is full of fat and makes you feel good. A cop is full of shit and will make you feel their hot steamy cock as they ram it up your ass with some justice sprinkled on top.
What’s a vegetable’s favorite dance?
The cabbage patch.
How did the cannibal know the girl he was eating for dinner had COVID-19?
She lost her taste.
What's a pedo's favorite snack?
Sour Patch Kids.
If McDonald's is fast food, then Dairy Queen is fast cream.
What's the difference between a CEO and licorice?
The licorice is black.
What does broccoli and sex have in common?
If you were forced to have it as a kid, you’re gonna hate it as an adult.