New Father Jokes - Page 11 - Worst Jokes Ever

A proud new dad sits down with his own father.

His father says, "Son,you now have a child of your own, so I think it's time I gave you this." And so, he pulls out a book: 1001 Dad Jokes.

The young man says, "Dad, I'm honored," as tears well up in his eyes.

His father says, "Hi, Honoured, I'm Dad."

Why does your father went away? Cuz he needs da milk

i would make a dad joke, but i dont have a dad to joke about.

A father of five puts on gas mask and a hazard suit, and walks outside, but before he could make it, his son came and asked "Dad, what are you wearing?". The father would answer with "A costume for Halloween.". the child asked "can i join?". He said no, for he said it's their last Halloween. *after that, I saw green smoke all over the same house they lived in.

Once, my father came home and found me in front of a roaring fire. That made my father very mad, as we didn't have a fireplace.

“Uh daddy harder” the orphan said oh wait he doesn’t have a daddy

Did I ever tell you my father should have been on the plane that crashed into the twin towers. But that's just my opinion.

Some guy come to me and said I'm your dad friend.. he ask me to pick you up.. *Laughing freaking hard* and told him you dig the grave?

A son tells his father, "I have an imaginary girlfriend." The father sighs and says, "You know, you could do better." "Thanks Dad," the son says. The father shakes his head and goes, "I was talking to your girlfriend."

What does a man with 20 children do now?

Now he eats sausages even with cellophane

You’re so fat, that when you were born, the nurse mistook you for the father.

You marry a single mother with an adult daughter. Now, your father marries the daughter. So, your father is your son now, because he is married to your daughter-in-law. But as your father's son and your father's father, you're your own grandpa!