Fate jokes

Me and my brother were called the twin towers. My brother lived up to his title after the plane crash.

Some people put zodiacs on everything.

They said they couldn’t go to the party because of cancer.

This kid was going to sleep and he said, "Night, Mum. Night, Dad. And night, Grandma, and bye, Grandpa." The next morning, Grandpa died, and the next night he said, "Night, Dad. Night, Mum. Night, Grandma." Grandma died the next morning. The next night he said, "Night, Mum, bye, Dad," and they heard the postman died because he was the dad, lol.

My aunt's star sign was Cancer, pretty ironic how she died.

She was eaten by a giant crab.

Three friends were stuck in the desert. They were struggling and trying to find food when they found a magical lamp. They rubbed it and out came a genie, and the genie says, "Each of you friends get to have one wish." So the first friend said, "I wish to go home," same as the second one. The third friend said, "I'm lonely. I wish my friends were with me!"

I'm a magician. Watch my closing act at the end of the rope.

If you read this, your life is a joke.

I was sitting in traffic the other day.

Probably why I got run over.

Suicide is the way to get even with the bitch called probability.

So I was asleep and woke up and went to work. My wife left already to her job. I was driving my car and ran over someone. I woke up in my bed, realized it was all a dream.

20 minutes later I got a phone call that my wife got hit by a car.

A child with cancer: "I want to be like you when I grow up." Doctor: "Oh, you're not going to grow up."

Why did the chicken cross the road?

To die.