Zodiac jokes

On September 11, Gemini ordered three pepperoni pizzas.

One came alone, one was late, and the third went the wrong way.

Every zodiac sign has a different hairstyle except Cancer.

All zodiac signs have a signature hairstyle except for cancer. :)

What zodiac sign has no hair?

Cancer.

Some people put zodiacs on everything.

They said they couldn’t go to the party because of cancer.

Son: Mom, I did the test and I have cancer!

Mom: YOU HAVE CANCER?!

Son: Mom, as my zodiac symbol...

Mom:....

I walked into the doctor's surgery and he said to me, "Pick a star sign, any star sign." I said, "Capricorn." He said, "Nah, you got cancer."

All zodiac signs have a hair style, but cancer is just a one-way thing.

For so long, I thought I was a Gemini, apparently I'm Cancer!

Bro, my friend is always using zodiacs as an excuse.

The other day he said he couldn't hang out with me because of cancer. I told him to fuck off. Then I realized why he was mad after that...

Q) What is the ONLY zodiac sign ever to be surgically removed?

A) Cancer.

Doctor: What is your zodiac sign?

Patient: Cancer, why?

Doctor: What are the chances?

Patient: Of what?

He: "Do you know you have a space in your uterus?"

She: "How can I resolve this?"

He: "Get a Cancer!"

So the other day, I was looking up zodiac sign stuff, you know, I'm a real big fan of that, and I come across this thing and it’s like all zodiac signs have their own hairstyles... except Cancer.

You know how all zodiacs have hairstyles... well not Cancers.

When the doctor asks you what your zodiac sign is,

You respond: "cancer."

Doctor says: "Well, what a coincidence!"

My aunt's star sign was Cancer, pretty ironic how she died.

She was eaten by a giant crab.