Event jokes
Why was 10 afraid?
Because it was in the middle of 9/11.
What's the worst part about burning your vegetables before dinner?
Explaining what happened to the nursing home while you're hungry.
I've never seen my dad since September 11. I wonder where he is...
What's a car's favorite place to hang out?
A CARnival!
Who needs Singles Day when you're single for the rest of your life!
Yo mama's so old, she was a waitress at the Last Supper.
Why did the man miss the funeral?
He wasn’t a mourning person.
Three conspiracy theories walked into a bar, now tell me that's not a coincidence!
Yo mama is so fat, they had to flood the Super Bowl to give her a bath.
Yo mama so fat, if she buys a fur coat, the WHOLE SPECIES will become extinct!
How do astronomers organize a party? They planet.
I decided to make a charity bungee jump for the local disabled. It's called "Spastics on Elastics."
How are Kobe’s death and people in 9/11 the same? They both hit the ground really hard.
Every kid in a classroom is relevant, because if one of them gets shot, they will all be featured on the news.
I don't like making 9/11 jokes because every joke about 9/11 I make has a tendency to crash and burn.
What is the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? One less drunk.
What did the 9/11 survivor say when he went back to his family? "You won't believe it! The Twin Towers became conjoined twins when it happened!"
Who's the world's fastest readers?
9/11 victims.
What has 3 legs, 4 arms, and 5 heads?
The finish line at the Boston Marathon.
Why were the people during 9/11 mad because they ordered pepperoni sandwiches, but they got two planes?