Emotion jokes

Ur dad is mad.

The longer the relationship, the longer the breakup will hurt you. Better break up now ooo.🤣

"Just ditched a woman. Feelin' good!" -Techno

1273 please kill me, everyone hates me.

I hate crying.

You hear that? That’s the sound of me not caring.

Please stop hurting people's feelings, or they'll hang around the house.

I was bullying an orphan, then I said, "What, you gonna run home and cry to your mom?"

I crashed into the back of a car at the lights today.

A really short guy got out of it and said, “I’m not happy.”

I said, “Well, which one are you then?”

I started crying when Dad started cutting onions.

Onions was a good dog.

Happiness belonged to you, then gave you depression.

I'm going to start taking confetti with me to therapy so when my therapist asks me, "How are you?" I can say "sad" and toss the confetti everywhere. It'll be like a real-life iMessage!

My emo friend tried to hi-five a tree. It left him hanging.

Me: And this is the room I cry in.

Date: You've said that about every room.

Me: Correct!

Therapy - Expensive - Years of hard work - Emotionally draining - Tough to find

Screaming in the woods - Free - Immediate relief - Scares hunters enough to leave, therefore saving innocent animals - Potential to make friends with people who are also screaming in the woods.

After standing in line staring at McDonald's menu for 17 minutes,

Me: "Okay, I'm ready. Can you help me not be sad all the time?"

Fuck youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu na na na na na na!

How do ghosts cry?

Boo hoo.

How do demons cry?

ERCDVHVXRCDHGHDCFHBGFBHGN FGEHJGNVEGHDNES BGEWYSHGBEWHGSGNBDGEBSHNZAGCHNSNGEHSNGVHGNNEBDSVZHGB.

Being mean.

What's at the bottom of the ocean and shivers?

A nervous wreck.