That one person who can never bring a smile to your face...
Until you push them down 3 flights of stairs.
What did the kid with cancer say? "Can-I see my mom one more time?"
I know it's cheesy, but I feel grate.
Why did the sea cry?
Because it felt salty and blue.
My happiness.
You can tell a lot about a woman's mood just by her hands. For example, if she's holding a gun, she's probably angry.
You're dead inside.
(Stabs him 23 times)
Play dead, they said.
Wasn't too hard.
I've been dead inside for years.
The difference between women and beer is that beer makes you happy for nothing, why women make you angry for nothing.
Why was the whale sad?
Because he is blue!
So, my dad was drinking, so he was drunk, and I was sad. But can you be my friend, please?
I want to die.
Roses are red, I don't know why, Living is hard, I want to die.
Daniel takes his frustrations out on Shaenaya and his sexual frustrations out on Arunima.
How do you make a plumber cry?
Kill his whole family.
So, my best friend's boyfriend broke up with her, and she started to cry.
So I told her a "single" joke, then she said, "Go and fucking die, you insensitive bitch!"
I later said, "Ugh, fine, as your BFF, I will break his body for you—happy now?"
She said, "*sniff* yes."
Why does my dad hate me? Really, please tell me, I'm tired of the constant abuse and pain.
To all of you who can't understand using jokes as a coping mechanism... you know what I will ask of you :)
What fruit always feels depressed?
A blueberry.
I love breakups. My ex-girlfriends always end up in pieces.
