Elephant jokes

What did the zoo say to the snow ❄️? Get lost!

I went to the zoo but all I saw was a dog.

Yeah, it was a shih tzu.

Lil Johnny's teacher wanted to play an alphabet game, so she said, "What word starts with A?" Lil Johnny raised his hand fast, but she knew that he would say "ass," so she picked on Sally and she said, "Apple." She said, "What word starts with B?" Little Johnny raised his hand as fast as he could, but she knew that he would say something like "bitch," so she picked on Emmanuel and Emmanuel said, "Banana." She went all the way to W. Little Johnny raises hand as fast as he could again, and the teacher thought of a cuss word that could start with the letter W. She could not think of a cuss word that could start with W, so she called on Little Johnny. Little Johnny said, "Wow." The teacher said, "Good job." Then Little Johnny said, "Like wow, two elephants fucking!"

What do you call an ugly, grey thing?

Cinderelephant!

How can you tell that a woman cannot fit through a vent because she got pregnant from a baby elephant? Ain't no telling who's in better shape, the elephant or the woman. I guess it's probably Weight Watchers.

Your momma's so fat, she went on safari and got shagged by an elephant!

Ganesha is an elephant.

Why would you not let an elephant sleep in the same bed with you?

Because they stink and now the room smells like elephant shit.

I hate it when I go to the shop and people are like, "Oh, hey what are you doing here?"

Me: "Oh, you know, just hunting elephants."

What did the elephant say to the naked man?

"It's nice, but can it pick up peanuts?"

Did you hear about the elephant with no nose?! Me neither.

What do you call a helicopter, elephant, and rhino?

Hellephino (Hell if I know)

Q: My scale had my phone number on it. Wandering why, I looked up only to see an elephant in my face...

Draw an accurate diagram representing the elephant genitalia. Use all 30 sheets of paper provided.

Why did the elephant get kicked out of the public pool?

Because he kept on dropping his trunks! 🤣🤣🤣🤣

When can an elephant use an umbrella and not get wet?

When it's not raining.

How many potatoes to feed the elephant?

Your mama is so fat that when she went to the scale, it said, "No elephants allowed!"

Your mom is so fat that when she stood on a scale, it said, "We need an actual person, not an elephant!"

Hey Siri, what’s in my bank account?

You stupid shit, piece of elephant crap, you’re so ugly that when you were born, your nickname was bastard! You’re so ugly, that your crush fainted in front of you and was proclaimed dead! You’re so ugly that-

(Destroys phone cutely)