Eating jokes
What do squats eat? Numbers.
Why didn’t the moon eat dinner?
Because it was full! 🌕
Friend 1: What's your favorite drink or food?
Friend 2: Pizza.
Friend 3: Donuts.
Friend 4: I don't eat food but I do drink bleach.
Friend 1: (calling the suicide hotline)
Friend 2: (Calling the parents)
Why can't Chinese play baseball?
Because they eat the bats.
One day, two Chinese people with broken English go to America. When they arrive, they go to a small place to eat. When they look at the menu, they see "hot dog," but since their English is bad, they think it's literally a roasted dog and order it. When it comes back, they're both surprised, and one of them asks,
"What part of the dog did you get?"
Today I told my sis, "Knock knock."
She said, "Who's there?"
I said, "I Eat eat my mop."
She said, "I eat mop poo instead of who."
Why do feminists eat so much pussy?
To get the taste of dick out of their mouths.
Does it cycle now, you stupid bitches?
Why was I stress eating on the train track?
To wait to get hit.
Famous last words: I COULD EAT THIS IN ONE BITE!
What did the snowman ⛄️ eat after dinner?
Ice cream 🍨.
Why does the paper follow up with wine because it was junk? Do wrong, so wrong that you don’t even exist because nobody even eats it. Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Haha ha ha! Haha ha haha ha ha! Ha hah hah hah ha!
Dear Hearing People,
We, deaf people, ain’t dead. We can use our hands to talk, eat & fist your face to give you some 💡 awareness that we can understand you 💯 meanwhile we laugh at you 🤡 We can even dance via vibration through music.
Do you know the song w lyric like this 👇 *white b.... accent: Ohhh.. MY God BECKY.. L👀k at her butt. IT is SO BIG. *BIG BEAT DROP* I...LIKE...BIG...BUTT...I cannot LIE 👻 I promise we ain’t ghosting around - Brittany Rose.
Why is 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 ate 9.
Why don't feminists like to eat hotdogs? Because they remind them of men's dicks.
Vegetarian: I prefer plants.
Herbivore: I just like food.
Cannibal: I'm a people person.
Why doesn't a teddy bear eat? Because it is already stuffed.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Yull.
Yull who?
You'll be sorry if you eat all the fruitcake!
What did the fat girl say to the donut?
"I'm going to eat you tonight..."
Why did the monster 🧟♀️ put the cook in a bowl?
He wanted a chef salad. 🥗😂
Why don’t Belgians eat shit sandwiches?
They don’t fancy bread!