Eating jokes
Imagine this... you're a lesbian, and you're doing it with your cannibal girlfriend. You say, "Eat me, baby!"
She pulls out a knife and fork.
What's the difference between boogers and broccoli?
Kids won't eat the broccoli.
Your legs are just like Oreos! I wanna split the ends and eat what's in between.
I went to a restaurant that serves "breakfast any time," so I ordered French toast during the Renaissance.
— Steven Wright
What do cannibals call pregnant women? A kinder surprise.
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A lick-a-lot-of-puss.
I had a dog with an eating disorder.
He wouldn’t eat any of my homework.
Why did the adopted kid eat the last cookie? Because he was the only one left to adopt; everyone hated him.
How do you get rid of butterflies in your stomach?
Stop eating caterpillars.
Why did everyone suggest that the cheetah eat all the pumpkins?
Because he cheated at everything!
Orphans will eat toes for food.
Lol, 1 week anniversary of me being on Worst Jokes Ever...
J0K35: *LETS START A JOKING KEGGAR*
A Joking keggar is where I get you drunk with some jokes, only on a special occasion.
Okay, y'all ready to get drunk with raging jokes? OK LETS GOOOOo
What do you call an LGBTQ+ disc jockey?
A DG (dee gay)
What does lava use when it can't walk properly?
A volCANEo
What do crackheads do when a black man got brutalized?
They start a HIGHot (say it like hi-ot, _riot_)
What is Satan's favorite DJ?
MarshHELLo
What do neck breakers use?
Snapchat
What did Twitter and Reddit eat with chocolate and marshmallows?
Instagraham crackers
Is this the last joke?
No
What is similar between a dog and my ex?
They are both commonly known as bitches
What number has a flu from a pig?
Nine flu (swine flu)
What did the loaf say when he was playing hide and seek?
BREADY OR NOT? HERE I GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Who is the best anime girl?
Well, it's pretty obvious 02 is on the second rank
Why did Sally get caned?
Because old men hurriCANED.
That was all
OR WAS IT?
Yes, it was (Come back on Halloween for another Joking Keggar)
A "type person" is addicted to eating sugar.
When the doctor saw this, he said,
"From Type 2 Diabetes!"
Get it?
A brain eats cheddar cheese.
It was 2017, and lots of people were hating RiceGum because he released "Frick Da Police," a diss track insulting Idubbbz's Content Cop video on RiceGum.
A few hours after the diss track was released, someone went to Rice's house and spray painted "Asian Jake Paul" on the wall of the front of his house.
Rice went to "meet" Idubbbz, then he saw the graffiti.
"WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEREEEEEEEEEEEEEE?"
Hours later, police found 4 suspects.
"Explain."
Sus 1: I don't vandalize.
Sus 2: I was staying indoors because it was rainy.
Sus 3: I fucking hate RiceGum, but I would not ruin his cheap ass house lol.
Sus 4: I eat bricks.
Police: I know who.
RiceGum: Who?
Police: ITS-
807907070707007607865909685780970695067586708650968095768076895708769875660980765970659062870907965607867856067586908
Notice anything in the number crowd?
Comment the answer below and I will see who is correct.
A no legged manager runs the nearest pizza place called Your Pizza Is A Joke.
I (J0K35) worked there and this happened...
Manager: WHY ARE THE PINEAPPLES IN THE TRASH?
Me: Because nobody eats fucking pineapple pizza.
Manager: THAT'S IT! I'M KICKING YOU OUT OF THIS PLACE!
Me: You can't kick me out.
Manager: Why not? Huh?
Me: Because you need legs to kick, and you don't have any.
The most unrealistic part of Chotta Bheem is not him eating a laddu and getting power. It's him eating a whole laddu in one shot.
Why do you have to wipe yourself with toilet paper? Because bugs can crawl, eat your poop, and drink your pee!
What does iCloud eat for lunch?
Your documents.
You couldn't spit out a good sentence, even if you ate a bowl of alphabet soup.