Downing jokes

So, once upon a time, there was a man who lived in his house with his wife.

He got up to go out to work and closed the front door behind him.

Not even four seconds later, he came back inside panicking, saying, "There's a rabbit with a gun outside!"

The wife replied, "Oh, don't worry, rabbits don't have guns. They can't shoot people; you must be imagining things."

The man calmed down for a few minutes, and after some reassuring, he eventually decided to try to go back out to work again.

So he stepped outside the front door, and the rabbit shot him.

I invented a time-traveling machine and traveled back to Pangea. I warned the dinosaurs about the deadly asteroid. They told me, "It wasn't an asteroid... it was Pionel Pessi's penalty ball ricocheted from Mars that made them extinct." Tears ran down my face. Shame on you, Pessi!

What does a blowjob from an 80-year-old and bungee jumps have in common?

You feel the rush, but don't look down.

The real reason Steven Hawking died is he was drunk and tried to go down a flight of stairs.

Why couldn't the kid with Down syndrome play football?

Because he got all the downs.

The reason Stephen Hawkings died is probably because he fell off his wheelchair, and he must've pressed shut down by accident.

I saw Stephen Hawking using an ATM. It is nice to see he had found someone before he shut down.

When I was in high school, me and my friends would play with this girl who had Down syndrome.

We would get into a circle around her and say, "Nightmare, nightmare!"

I raped your mom. I flipped her upside down and called the position "wow."

If a person walks off a hundred-foot cliff and halfway down screams, "Why did I do that?" Then a second person walks off the same one-hundred-foot cliff and screams the same verse, "Why did I do that?" Then another person walks off the cliff and screams the same line, "Why did I do that," and the next person does the same thing. What do you call that?

(Stupid People)

What takes knowledge to do and also takes knowledge away?

Looking down the barrel and pulling the trigger. 😂

Why can't orphans become famous?

Because it will become easier for Technoblade to track them down.

What's the name for a short legged tramp?

A low-down bum.

What's red, green, and slimy and slides down the chip shop window?

Abortion of chips.

There was a man in a tower, and the other man thought it was a girl, so he said, "Let down your long hair." He said, "OK, I will let my big, super long, hairy penis down for you to climb and suck." Then the other man said, "If you have such a long dick, suck it yourself. See ya, b*tch."

What do a blackjack dealer and my uncle have in common?

They both hit me face down on the table.

Two pencils walking down the street.

Which one hasn’t got AIDS?

The one with the rubber on.

I was riding my bike down the road!

When a car started coming, I started running.

It put me in a crash with my elbow through my ass! ;)

When your wife gets pregnant and you don't want a kid, just come on down to Momma Mia's Pizzeria and abortion clinic!

"Knock Knock"

"Who's there?"

"John."

"John who?"

John broke down into tears as his Mother's Alzheimer's had gotten progressively worse.