Downing jokes

Plum

I was walking down the street and saw a kid slip on a plum.

I look to my right and died of laughter because I did the same!

Plane

So, Biden, Zelensky, and Putin are on a plane, and the plane loses altitude and goes down, but there are 2 parachutes. Putin takes the first one and jumps because he is a greedy twat. So he jumps, but then Biden says, "You go, Zelensky. I am much older than you, and it is ok for me to die." So Zelensky takes the second one and jumps, but when he did, the plane regains altitude, and Biden got to Washington, DC, all fine. They found out the reason was Zelensky's steel balls.

Syndrome

Why did the other Down syndrome guy say to the other Down syndrome guy?

What is going on here?

Breakfast! 😂

Memes

Sugar

"Jonny, Jonny?"

"Yes, Papa?"

"Eating sugar?"

"No, Papa."

"Open your mouth!" Shoves hand down throat-

Prank

Hey guys, the prank for today is when I lied about feeling sick so I wouldn't have to go to school.

Introduction: This prank was committed a week ago! Around 5:00 a.m. in the morning!

1. I got out some eggs, milk, salt, and a little bit of mashed olives... well those are the main ingredients.

2. I mixed it all up for about 2 mins just to make it look really like barf...no going to school today!

3. I put it under the sofa just to give it some solid scent to it.

4. I fixed my breakfast eggs and bacon. Then when my mom comes down I...PULL OUT MY FAKE BARF!!!!! News flash make a fake excuse for her to leave! My excuse is "I need something its in my room I don't want to get cause it would waste time".

She fell for it. Then I pull out my FAKE barf which looks like real barf. Then you say or I said "Mom I don't feel so good"! News flash: Don't over sell it think about all that boring school work! and guess what she fell for it so I spend all day doing nothing...absolutely nothing!

Well that's the prank. Anymore pranks you want ask me in the comment section! Byeeeeeeeeeee

Penis

I have a penis.

How's that for a fucking joke? It's not a joke. It's terrible.

500 thumbs down and I'll lop off my dick with a razor.

Fan

Why do athletes cool down fast? Because they have fans.

Wash your hands.

Orange

Why did the orange stop in the middle of the road?

Please take this down, it's not funny at all!

It's a joke, not a dick, so don't take it so hard!

Book

I was reading a book about anti-gravity, I couldn't put it down!

Sex

It’s nice hitting it from the back when my wife has wide hips.

Her butt cheeks look like big huge ball sacks as my thighs smack up against them when I’m thrusting. I like to finish off by grinding my weiner up and down her back like a gay man frotting his schlong on his partner’s ding dong.

Wish

Three friends go to a water park and meet a genie. "You each get one wish." "When you get to the top of the slide, you shall scream your wish as you go down." The first man went down the slide and screamed "Coca Cola," and the pool was filled with Coca-Cola.

The next ugly-ass looking mf goes down the slide and screams "C-M&Ms" as if he wasn’t just about to say cum—then the pool was full of cu—I mean M&Ms. The last horny-ass bitch is so excited he says "Weee!" Then the pool is full of piss. He was upset the pool wasn’t full of dildos./j

Mama

Yo mama is so short, Minions look down at her.

Yo mama is so fat that she volunteered for the Hunger Games 'cause she thought it was an eating competition.

Yo mama is so ugly when Santa Claus saw her, he yelled "Ho Ho Holy Sh*t!"

Yo mama is so old, when she walked into an antique store, they didn't let her leave.

Yo mama is so stupid, she sold her car for gas money.

Shop

Someone asked me where to find de wae?

I replied with: Oh, de wea, that's a shop. It's down the road.

Thumb

Everyone give this joke a thumb's down and see if it can become the worst rated joke on the site.

Shooting

GF: Laying down.

BF: GROANING

GF: Are you good at aiming and shooting?

BF: Yeah, why?

GF: Shoot that did in there.

BF: Mmmhuugh

Part

The best part of you ran down your mother's leg... Einstein got ready to climax while doing math but realized you can't cumtilyain cumtilion. It's after sucktillion fucktillion.

Cat

What do you call a cat 🐈 that is glued down? A big cluck.