Why did the baby cross the road? The car seat wasn’t strapped in.
Little Johnny is in class one day and little Timmy starts laughing. The teacher says what's so funny? He said I can see your bra strap. The teacher says don't come back to class for a week, so he get up and walked out. A few minutes later little Billy starts laughing, and she ask what's funny now? Little Billy said I can see both of your bra straps. The teacher says get out of my class room for a month. So little Billy got pissed he walked out and slammed the door, this scared the teacher and she dropped the chalk. She picked it up then she stood back up and she sees little Johnny walking out of the classroom. She asked where do you think your going? He said well teach after what I saw I'm done with school for a lifetime.
There is a new kind of jock strap, it only holds one nut. It is called a trump supporter.
A man was walking down the street with a swivel chair under one arm, a computer under the other and a desk strapped to his back. A policeman ran over to him and handcuffed him, saying "I'm arresting you for impersonating an office, sir"
Are you happy to see me or is that a bomb strapped to your chest and detonator in your hand?
What do lesbians and mechanics have in common? They both use strap on tools
You don't usually see strap-hangers carrying newspapers these days. But one guy with the New York Times is seen getting on a crowded F Train. He notices a single seat not taken. Suspicious, he gets closer and sniffs it out. The seat is discolored but dry. Throwing caution to the winds, he removes a section from the paper and sets it down to buffer the spot from his behind. He sits down, stretches his feet and yells out: "Try sitting on your smartphones, suckers!"
What do you use to strap an eagle's nest together?
An eagleastic band!
Why can lesbians not drive cars?
They always strap the wrong thing on.
My dad said wheres pickles the family cat i said im sorry to say hes in the sky, oh i see he passed away no i strapped him to 20 fireworks
How did the Dead baby cross the road? It was strapped to the chicken.