Dont jokes
I don't know what to write here, just like...
I don’t like to tell school shooter jokes because they are usually aimed at a younger audience.
Why don’t orphans play the game of hide-and-seek?
They won’t be found because no one will look for them.
Son: Dad, what's a morbid joke?
Father: Walk over to a homeless man and throw a rock at him, then you will know.
Son: But Dad, I don't have arms or legs.
Father: Now you know.
What do you call a person who wants to be punched a lot?
A clout chaser.
Search up "clout meaning" if you don't get it.
Me: Why am I an orphan?
Friend: I don't know.
Me: Ask your mom.
What's the best thing about an orphan GF?
You don't have to meet her parents.
My wife left a note on the fridge. The note read, "It's not working." I don't know what she's talking about. I opened the fridge, and it worked fine!
Hello, if you don't know me (which you probably don't), my name is watersharky, or WS, or Shark.
I am a normal, weird kid/preteen, and that's it. If you want more info on me, I will gladly share! Shark out.
Good night, sleep tight, don't let the bedbugs bite, and if they do, hit them with a shoe till they're all black and blue!
Is it weird that a milk carton has a date, and I don’t?
Man, don't you hate it when you hit a speed bump by an orphanage but then realize there's no speed bumps here...
What's the difference between Jesus and a dead, naked baby?
I don't worship Jesus.
This joke does not work in print, you have to speak it to someone.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Helen Keller.
Helen Keller who?
(Don't say anything).
Helen Keller who?
...you will get a laugh...ty.
Man: I must confess, Father.
Priest: What are you here to confess?
Man: I hit my wife and blamed her for what happened to our son.
Priest: And what happened to your son?
Man: He said a man raped him.
Priest: When and where did this happen?
Man: A local church. I don't know which one.
Priest: ...By whom?
Man: A priest, he said. He said the priest had black hair and blue eyes, kind of like you.
Priest: ...Shit
A police pulls over a Mexican man trying to get into America. The Mexican man comes up with some sob story and the police say, "All right, all right ok," says the police, "I'll let you go if you can come up with a sentence that has the words green, pink, and yellow in it." The Mexican thought about it long and hard for almost 45 minutes and then the police says, "Ok ok let's hear it" after waiting impatiently. The Mexican said, "Ok ok don't rush me. I'm ready." The Mexican replied, "Ok when my phone green green, I pink it up and say Yellow!"
Why don't Amish people water ski?
Because their horses would drown.
We don't got sluts in the South, we got NATS: Nasty Ass Traveling Sluts.
I have a lot of eggcellent egg puns, get the yolk... Oh come on, don't be hard-boiled!
Me: I just came home from Africa, and guess what I saw.
Friend: I don't know.
Me: A black market.