Doesnt jokes
"Hi, Mrs. Jackson, can Matt come out and play?"
"Oh, Johnny, you know Matt doesn't have any arms or legs."
"I know, we just wanted to use him as third base."
2k14 was so realistic when I switched to Kobe, the pass button stopped working.
What do you call a mouse that doesn't like being known about?
Anonymouse.
Why doesn't the orphan's phone have a homepage, being it doesn't have a home?
Why doesn't Batman have super vision?
His parents died.
This isn’t a joke. Quiet kid jokes are so cliché. Like since when was there an original quiet kid joke like smh. Doesn’t help because I’m a quiet kid and people act as if I’m so dangerous and it’s like the only thing they say to me. Being judged as some big bad monster for being AN INTROVERT!! These jokes used to be funny to me, but now I’m just sick of them...
I have a daughter; she’s a fan. Her name is Penny. Fan she was born on the mountain Pen y Fan. I adopted her because her mum fell off the cliff after birthing Penny. It doesn’t matter, really; Penny’s mum wasn’t a big fan of her anyway.
I made a website for orphans. It doesn’t have a home page.
Why do you wrap a hamster in duct tape?
So it doesn’t explode when you’re fucking it.
Stephen is lucky he doesn’t need a vibrator.
He’s got himself.
Why can't all guys be more like Kenny? He doesn't get all upset when his mom isn't in the mood.
Chuck Norris doesn't ride horses.
Horses ride him.
Your mom is so fat that she doesn't need WiFi because she is worldwide.
Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Oh, wait, he doesn’t walk.
KFC doesn't mean Kentucky Fried Chicken, it means "Kill Fat Children."
How many times does Ariana Grande knock at the door?
She doesn’t, she just uses 7 rings.
What's the difference between George Bush and Donald Trump?
One is into airline security, and one is into wall, turrets, and rockets.
What's the similarity between George Bush and Donald Trump?
It just doesn't work...
¡Hola, soy Dora!
Can you help me find the two fucks I'm supposed to give?!
I told my dad that I wanted to go to a college with a 100% acceptance rate and a 50% graduation rate, and he said, "Your mom doesn't count as a college!"
Hello, I am back with more mind-blowing facts.
1. Why are cookies called cookies and bacon called bacon when you bake cookies and cook bacon?
2. If you tuck your shirt into your trousers and it is called tucking your shirt in, does that mean if your shirt is over your trousers, doesn't that mean it's called tucking your trousers into your shirt?