Disease jokes

I don't like them white, pale, always talking about death EMO kids!

Sorry, I meant CHEMO kids.

What's the difference between a child and a cancer diagnosis? At least the cancer grows up and leaves eventually.

It is September. What's the difference between a stage four colon cancer patient and Santa Claus? Santa is coming for Christmas!

If laughter is contagious, Kris's jokes are immunity.

Yo mama is so fat, she gave a memory foam mattress Alzheimer's.

You're so ugly that they faked a whole pandemic just so you can put on a mask to cover that ugly-ass face.

There's a new bird disease, it's called churpies.

It's a canariel disease, untweetable.

What’s the difference between a photocopier and the flu?

One makes facsimiles; the other makes sick families.

You're so bad at games, bro, they gave you AIDS before losing! 😹

Why is there no medication in Africa?

Because doctors advised, "You don't take it on an empty stomach."

My friend asked which is better to have, and you have to choose: autism or Down syndrome?

What's meaner than a pit bull with AIDS?

The guy that gave it to him.

Did you know one of the singers of YMCA had AIDS? Y-M-C-AIDS.

Why did Stephen Hawking die?

Cause he would never look both ways.

If Stephen Hawking was a boxer, he would roll with the punches.

Why is he called Stephen Hawking?

Because he is always trying to hawk up phlegm to clear his throat.

I'll tell you a good joke. Stephen Hawking went for a walk.

What did Stephen Hawking say when he rode a bike?

"Hey look...no hands...or legs!"

Why does cancer kill you? Because it does. 🌝

If two people who have the clap sleep together, did they make an applause?