Disease jokes
Gwen, we can chat in 2 months. My aunt just died from COVID, and it is taking forever for us to get there to California. I love you, your boyfriend, Prince!
Why is the disease lung cancer never hungry? Because it's eating your lungs.
"Oh, hey guys, do you know I saw a guy with dementia?"
"Oh, hey guys, do you know I saw a guy with dementia?"
"Oh, hey, do you know I saw a guy with dementia?"
A lady sees a doctor about a tummy ache. After her check up, the Doctor said, “Looks like you’ll be needing nappies in about 9 months time.”
The lady asks, “Am I pregnant?” To which the Doctor replied, “No, you’ve got bowel cancer.”
What were Stephen Hawking's last words?
What's ALS?
Friend: I got bit.
Other friend: By what?
Friend: A dog.
Other friend: (Runs away and the next day you know everyone is wearing a mask and the friend gets expelled because of rabies.)
What's the best thing about Alzheimer's?
You can hide your own Easter Eggs!
What's the difference between my dad and cancer? Cancer doesn't leave you.
I'm jealous of cancer. My dad beat me but never beat cancer.
What are all grandmas infected with? Defiantly not a parasite!
For so long, I thought I was a Gemini, apparently I'm Cancer!
The bright side of this pandemic is now both my hands look equally chapped and raw.
What does dark humor and a child with cancer have in common?
That it will never get old.
What's the difference between milk and a cancer patient?
There's none, they both don't age well.
Hot shingles in your neighborhood wanting to get nailed.
How did Stephen Hawking die? He went in the rain! 😂😂😂
What can you catch but not throw?
A cold!
I'm sorry your dad beat you instead of cancer.
My happiest moment in life was getting a positive grade on my H.I.V. test without studying.
Q: How many more chemo treatments did the cancer patient need?
A: Tumor.