What do you call a javelin thrower with Parkinson’s?
Shakespeare.
Disease Jokes
Why is there no medication in Africa?
Because doctors advised, "You don't take it on an empty stomach."
What’s the difference between a photocopier and the flu?
One makes facsimiles; the other makes sick families.
Yo mama is so fat, she gave a memory foam mattress Alzheimer's.
You're so ugly that they faked a whole pandemic just so you can put on a mask to cover that ugly-ass face.
Why did Stephen Hawking cross the street?
He didn’t; he never did.
If two people who have the clap sleep together, did they make an applause?
Stephen Hawking, more like Stephens not walking.
Stand? Wait. No.
Why does cancer kill you? Because it does. 🌝
How do sick Mexicans say hello?
"Ebola."
I don't like them white, pale, always talking about death EMO kids!
Sorry, I meant CHEMO kids.
My first thought when I read Betty Pear's obituary was, "Thank God for Alzheimer's!"
Q' What's an Alzheimer's victim's favorite type of comedy?
A. I forget.
Symptoms of Schizophrenia.
The symptoms of this condition are fairly easy to recognize because they stand out so distinctly from a person’s usual behavior. In order for a diagnosis to be made, the person must suffer from two or more of the following for at least one month:
Delusions
Hallucinations
Did you hear about the story of the husband who told his wife she’d look sexier with her hair back?
Apparently, that’s not a nice thing to say to cancer patients.
A young man cracked a joke about dementia to his friend on the bus. The old man sitting next to him politely asked, “Can you stop making jokes about terminal diseases?”
He replied, “Yes, I cancer.” Then he cracked tumor.
EMINEM: His palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy.
WebMD: Cancer.
Question: What’s bald and is in a straight line?
Answer: The cancer ward. 😵😂😂
Cancer.
Dark humor is like cancer, it's even funnier when kids get it.
Why did Mimi cross the road?
She had cancer.
