Disease jokes
There's a new bird disease, it's called churpies.
It's a canariel disease, untweetable.
What's the difference between a child and a cancer diagnosis? At least the cancer grows up and leaves eventually.
It is September. What's the difference between a stage four colon cancer patient and Santa Claus? Santa is coming for Christmas!
My friend asked which is better to have, and you have to choose: autism or Down syndrome?
I don't like them white, pale, always talking about death EMO kids!
Sorry, I meant CHEMO kids.
Memes
Random post #4
If laughter is contagious, Kris's jokes are immunity.
Q. What's an Alzheimer's victim's favourite song? A. Stand Down at Sundown.
Why is there no medication in Africa?
Because doctors advised, "You don't take it on an empty stomach."
What do you call a javelin thrower with Parkinson’s?
Shakespeare.
Symptoms of Schizophrenia.
The symptoms of this condition are fairly easy to recognize because they stand out so distinctly from a person’s usual behavior. In order for a diagnosis to be made, the person must suffer from two or more of the following for at least one month:
Delusions
Hallucinations
Did you hear about the story of the husband who told his wife she’d look sexier with her hair back?
Apparently, that’s not a nice thing to say to cancer patients.
A young man cracked a joke about dementia to his friend on the bus. The old man sitting next to him politely asked, “Can you stop making jokes about terminal diseases?”
He replied, “Yes, I cancer.” Then he cracked tumor.
EMINEM: His palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy.
WebMD: Cancer.
Question: What’s bald and is in a straight line?
Answer: The cancer ward. 😵😂😂
Cancer.
Dark humor is like cancer, it's even funnier when kids get it.
How is a child with cancer and dark humor similar? They never get old.
Why did Mimi cross the road?
She had cancer.
A man sees a woman. He falls in love with her. Little did he know she had AIDS.
How do you die from Alzheimer's? You forget how to breathe.
Cancer jokes really grow on you--unlike the patients' hair.
Health commercials be like:
Serious side effects can cause:
Nausea, diarrhea, vomiting, chills, fever, cancer, diabetes, AIDS, chlamydia, lupus, Ebola, polio, leprosy, pulmonary edema, heart attack, heart failure, yellow fever, but worst of all, DEATH!