Disease jokes
Why did Stephen Hawking cross the street?
He didn’t; he never did.
The bright side of this pandemic is now both my hands look equally chapped and raw.
Stand? Wait. No.
If two people who have the clap sleep together, did they make an applause?
Why does cancer kill you? Because it does. 🌝
Memes
I don't like them white, pale, always talking about death EMO kids!
Sorry, I meant CHEMO kids.
Why is there no medication in Africa?
Because doctors advised, "You don't take it on an empty stomach."
Symptoms of Schizophrenia.
The symptoms of this condition are fairly easy to recognize because they stand out so distinctly from a person’s usual behavior. In order for a diagnosis to be made, the person must suffer from two or more of the following for at least one month:
Delusions
Hallucinations
Did you hear about the story of the husband who told his wife she’d look sexier with her hair back?
Apparently, that’s not a nice thing to say to cancer patients.
A young man cracked a joke about dementia to his friend on the bus. The old man sitting next to him politely asked, “Can you stop making jokes about terminal diseases?”
He replied, “Yes, I cancer.” Then he cracked tumor.
EMINEM: His palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy.
WebMD: Cancer.
Question: What’s bald and is in a straight line?
Answer: The cancer ward. 😵😂😂
Cancer.
Why did Mimi cross the road?
She had cancer.
A man sees a woman. He falls in love with her. Little did he know she had AIDS.
Dark humor is like cancer, it's even funnier when kids get it.
How is a child with cancer and dark humor similar? They never get old.
How do you die from Alzheimer's? You forget how to breathe.
Cancer jokes really grow on you--unlike the patients' hair.
Health commercials be like:
Serious side effects can cause:
Nausea, diarrhea, vomiting, chills, fever, cancer, diabetes, AIDS, chlamydia, lupus, Ebola, polio, leprosy, pulmonary edema, heart attack, heart failure, yellow fever, but worst of all, DEATH!
Bitches do be so flat, you would think they have breast cancer.
Q: How many more chemo treatments did the cancer patient need?
A: Tumor.