what happens when you eat a cat I love to eat cats for dinner
When Albert Einstein was making the rounds of the speaker’s circuit, he usually found himself eagerly longing to get back to his laboratory work. One night as they were driving to yet another rubber-chicken dinner, Einstein mentioned to his driver (a man who somewhat resembled Einstein in looks & manner) that he was tired of speechmaking.
“I have an idea, boss,” his driver said. “I’ve heard you give this speech so many times. I’ll bet I could give it for you.” Einstein laughed loudly and said, “Why not? Let’s do it!”
When they arrived at the dinner, Einstein donned the driver's cap and jacket and sat in the back of the room. The driver gave a beautiful rendition of Einstein’s speech and even answered a few questions expertly.
Then a supremely pompous professor asked an extremely esoteric question about anti-matter formation, digressing here and there to let everyone in the audience know that he was nobody’s fool. Without missing a beat, the driver fixed the professor with a steely stare and said, “Sir, the answer to that question is so simple that I will let my driver, who is sitting in the back, answer it for me.”
Are you having rabbit duck for dinner? Yeah Why? Because I got too obsessed with hares.
Do I do the same for dinner tomorrow morning for you
I had to get my dog 🐶 is it a tree 🌲 was your time and I had fun today after dinner 🍴 I had
A lawyer bought a beautiful yacht. He invited the law firm to come aboard for a great weekend. Saturday night was the candle light dinner and Sam drank too much, walked on the deck and fell over the rail into the water and was calling for help. Tom said, "Oh no the sharks will get him." All of the party lined along the rail and noticed the sharks were swimming around him in a circle. Jim said, the sharks are not even bothering him! And a shark lifted up his head out of the water and said, "Professional Courtesy."
This dad went out hunting, he killed a deer. He came home and he and his wife decided to have it for dinner but not tell their kids. Instead, they made them guess. The dad said "It's something that daddy calls mommy" The little girl yells to her brother "Don't eat it! It's an ass!"
Your at a buffet, you think your hungry for two, but misfortune happens when you think of your self, you get stuck looking at sides in the buffet, a roly poly gal you see in corner of your eye, eyeballing the main dishes in front at the end, you go in for the pickings, you get intercepted by a far more hungrier matter, but you find yourself getting slamed over the buffet table, and realize you are gasping for air, and she's is tenderizing you for dinner.
Hi oooo was the day I was a kid I was going home to school today after dinner 🍽
What is the difference between the snow boots on the earth day today after dinner and walk home
What did Donald Trump serve to Justin Trudeau at a state dinner?
Poutine with Russian dressing!
What is the most annoying thing your parents say to you and what is dumbest thing someone can say that annoy you. The most annoying thing your parents can say: Finish your dinner, there are starving kids in Africa! No, you can't have any dessart untill you finish your dinner. (See how annoying that is!) The dumbest thing someone can say that annoys you: Why is your name crayla? Why is your last name Goldburg? Is it like a gold bird! (That is really annoying if you ask me!) Thanks reading this...bye!
Kids, next time you have school dinners, make sure you have something you actually like so you don't have to shove all your food over to one side of the plate to make it look like you've eaten more than you actually have.
white people: *come to America, meet natives and take food, kil them, rape them and enslave them* natives: can y- white people: hey you remember all that horrible shit we did to you lets have a good laugh about it over dinner with your buddies and my new wives
When you say to your dad ............................... AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! DAD BE LIKE ....... WHO WANTS MY SON NAN BE LIKE ME KID BE LIKE ........AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH GIVE ME #### ROUX WHAT ARE ROUX SAYS NAN UM THERE YOUR LIFE SAVINGS NAN BE LIKE LETS GET SOME ROUX
Here is a story, my best friend was Chinese, his name was Chong- king. I took him to a restaurant one day and he said “ I am Chong king. I said I know your name is Chong king, within a few minutes he just randomly died making weird noises and turning blue by every second.
Anyone know what happened?
What does skeleton said after dinner Bon-e Appétit
How did the guys with down syndrome split the dinner bill? They all made a down payment.
How do you quiet a baby down?
Make baby back ribs for dinner
was walking down the street when I was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked me for a couple of dollars for dinner. I took out my wallet, extracted ten dollars and asked,"If I give you this money, will you buy some beer with it instead of dinner?"
"No, I had to stop drinking years ago," the homeless man replied.
"Will you use it to go fishing instead of buying food?" I asked.
"No, I don't waste time fishing," the homeless man said.."I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive."
"Will you spend this on hunting equipment?" I asked.
"Are you NUTS!" replied the homeless man. "I haven't gone hunting in 20 years!"
"Well," I said, "I'm not going to give you money. Instead, I'm going to take you home for a shower and a terrific dinner cooked by my wife."
The homeless man was astounded. "Won't your wife be furious with you for doing that?
I replied, "Don't worry about that. It's important for her to see what a man looks like after he has given up drinking, fishing and hunting."
Not a joke but still dc
