Difference jokes

What's the difference Michael Jackson and a play station have in common...

They're both plastic and kids turn them on.

What's the difference between Jesus and a dead, naked baby?

I don't worship Jesus.

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Porsche?

I don't have a Porsche in the garage.

What's the difference between a dead baby and a slice of pizza?

A dead baby can't feed a family.

What's the difference between a baby and a tire swing?

A tire swing doesn't die when you hang it from a tree.

What's the difference between your mom and your dad? One leaves your life to go get milk, and the other cleans up after you, feeds you, and does your laundry.

What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a hostage?

I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

What's the difference between a dwarf and a Japanese man?

I don't know, you tell me.

What’s the difference between a bleeding child and a bleeding chimpanzee?

They're both crazy and now dead.

What is the difference between a terrorist and a prostitute?

The prostitute can blow you more than once.

Ayo Lucas, a sussy baka!

What's the difference between a baby and a sandwich?

I don't f**k a sandwich before I eat it.

What's the difference between a prostitute and a trash bag?

There's a limit to how much trash goes in the trash bag.

How can you tell the difference between a Christian priest and a zit?

One waits until you're twelve to come on your face.

What’s the difference between someone’s wife and a plate?

They both have to stay in the kitchen.

What's the difference between a dog and a foster child?

A dog doesn't run to the police after you beat it.

What's the difference between MJ and myself?

Nothing at all.

What's the difference between Obama and Trump?

Obama was a president and Trump was a whiny bitch!

What can a dwarf do standing up that a tall person can't do standing up?

Perform fellatio.

What's the difference between an orphan's life and a knife?

A knife has a point.