Difference jokes
What's the difference between my father and acne?
Acne waited for me to be a teenager before coming on my face.
What's the difference between a terrorist training camp and an orphanage?
I don't know, I just fly the drone.
It is September. What's the difference between a stage four colon cancer patient and Santa Claus? Santa is coming for Christmas!
What's the difference between me and Spongebob?
Spongebob can actually get ripped.
What's the difference between the Twin Towers and orphans?
The parents remember 9/11.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked at least.
What is the difference between me and food?
Food has a use.
What is the difference between a pencil and a woman?
At least one has a point.
What’s the difference between a photocopier and the flu?
One makes facsimiles; the other makes sick families.
Q: What's the difference between a Genealogist and a Gynecologist?
A: One looks up the family tree and the other looks up the family bush.
Me when my girlfriend comes home, I check her phone and there are 100 texts from a different guy asking her out, and her text says yes.
Get the whip, you're out!
What's the difference between taking a shit and the Ottawa police force?
Usually taking a shit only requires one ass wipe!
What is the difference between a carpet muncher and a female prostitute?
If you want a female prostitute to be a bitch, you have to give her money first.
What is the difference between an Apple and an orphan?
The apples get picked.
Why are dogs different than orphans?
Because dogs don't cry for their parents.
What is the difference between interstate and intercourse?
What is the difference between you and a calendar?
A calendar has dates.
What's the difference between Rorochan and skydivers?
One does it for the cash, the other for the views.
What’s the difference between rap lovers and the Gigachad?
Rap lovers get more pussy.
What's the difference between you and a calendar?
Calendars got dates.