Die jokes
Why did the orphan die?
He killed himself because the lack of a support system made him depressed.
Depression: Here, your mom just died.
Me: My mom is already dead.
What does Diana stand for?
Died In A Nasty Accident.
I knew a girl that died from having phone sex... She died of hearing aids.
A man and a giraffe walk into a bar.
After a few drinks, the giraffe falls over and dies. The man begins to walk out when the bartender stops him.
“Hey, you can’t leave that lyin’ there!” The bartender yells out.
The man turns around: “It’s not a lion. It’s a giraffe.”
How did Mace Windu die?
He fell out the windoo.
U die from robot bite.
My grandpa's last words before he died in Vietnam were, "What the fuck did I step on?"
Stephen Hawking died due to the BIOS update. He shut down because the power cable got chewed.
Hey, wake up. I just murdered your family, but I live alone.
Then who are these people in your house? They are people in my house? Well, not anymore, dumb bitch. You're welcome, you could have died.
Why do my kids die?
Stinky Oussy :D
When a Muslim dies, he gets 72 virgins.
It's the same thing with priests, except the virgins are children.
How to make an orphan die?
Tell them to yell until their folks come home.
My Italian chef friend died last week. He pasta away.
This category is messed up.
My Mom died in 9/11, at least she was doing what she loved, flying planes.
Girlfriend: You remind me of a cell phone.
Girlfriend's ex: Why?
Girlfriend: Because you're about to die.
Tell an emo, "Do you get jealous when your phone dies?"
Why do orphans want to die?
Because they might see their parents in Heaven.
In the movie "Cars 2", there is a priest, which means car Jesus died for the sins of the cars.
Every woman will die in five seconds.
Mother: Dies.
Sister: Dies.
Girlfriend: Lives.
You: 🤬