Depression jokes
Teacher: What do you want when you grow up?
That depressed kid in class: Dead.
I love to decorate my room because it's a great way to express your heart, though I just remembered, my room is pretty black and empty...
How do you get a depressed girl to suck your dick?
Pour bleach on it.
What’s the difference between me and cancer?
My dad didn’t beat cancer.
Has anyone else ever been jealous when their laptop dies?
What do emo kids have in common with orphans?
They both depress'd on the inside.
What is an emo kid's favorite song?
"Chain Hang Low" because he hangs low off a chain tied to a tree.
The last words from a depressive person are: "I finally see a train!"
Depressed should be spelled "depraseed" because then they would be 1, 2, 5, 9.
I tried to name my grass "emo" so it will cut itself.
I wish my lawn was emo so it would cut itself.
Me and my suicidal friend are close, so I took him to the mall to treat him.
We bought snacks, a new controller for his Xbox, and LED lights for his room to hopefully brighten his mood. After we scanned the last item, the machine beeped by itself.
To all my bullies: don’t call me gay because I’m not happy.
What does a depressed person say when they're happy?
"..."
What's the difference between me and a depressed kid? At least I'm out of the grave.
Yo life got no meaning, just like your dad when he left. Like if it's a good one.
"Why didn't the boy pick up his ice cream?" - Margaret
"Why?" - Depressed boy
"Because he got ran over." - Margaret
"I wish that was me." - Depressed boy
Hey, that's the thing my grandpa has. They say that to treat it, I should call him a bitch!
What do depression and suicide have in common?
Nothing, they're both hanging.
I want to die at a party. This is because nobody can be sad over me.