Depression jokes
I wish my lawn was emo so it would cut itself.
The last words from a depressive person are: "I finally see a train!"
What do emo kids have in common with orphans?
They both depress'd on the inside.
What is an emo kid's favorite song?
"Chain Hang Low" because he hangs low off a chain tied to a tree.
Depressed should be spelled "depraseed" because then they would be 1, 2, 5, 9.
Me and my suicidal friend are close, so I took him to the mall to treat him.
We bought snacks, a new controller for his Xbox, and LED lights for his room to hopefully brighten his mood. After we scanned the last item, the machine beeped by itself.
Has anyone else ever been jealous when their laptop dies?
What’s the difference between me and cancer?
My dad didn’t beat cancer.
To all my bullies: don’t call me gay because I’m not happy.
What do depression and suicide have in common?
Nothing, they're both hanging.
I want to die at a party. This is because nobody can be sad over me.
My joke is your life support getting unplugged because my phone is about to die.
You have five seconds to kill me. 1... 2... 3... 4... Thank you. I can rest now. WAIT, HOW AM I TALKING?????????????????????
Hey, that's the thing my grandpa has. They say that to treat it, I should call him a bitch!
What's the difference between me and a depressed kid? At least I'm out of the grave.
What does a depressed person say when they're happy?
"..."
Yo life got no meaning, just like your dad when he left. Like if it's a good one.
"Why didn't the boy pick up his ice cream?" - Margaret
"Why?" - Depressed boy
"Because he got ran over." - Margaret
"I wish that was me." - Depressed boy
Real Pokémon.
Anxiety evolved into depression. Depression was the final stage evolution.
Rope: Hey buddy! Want to hang?
Me: Maybe I can hang later...
Cock: Can I have attention from your Dad now?