Depression jokes
Depressed should be spelled "depraseed" because then they would be 1, 2, 5, 9.
I tried to name my grass "emo" so it will cut itself.
Me and my suicidal friend are close, so I took him to the mall to treat him.
We bought snacks, a new controller for his Xbox, and LED lights for his room to hopefully brighten his mood. After we scanned the last item, the machine beeped by itself.
I wish my lawn was emo so it would cut itself.
To all my bullies: don’t call me gay because I’m not happy.
Yo life got no meaning, just like your dad when he left. Like if it's a good one.
What does a depressed person say when they're happy?
"..."
Hey, that's the thing my grandpa has. They say that to treat it, I should call him a bitch!
What's the difference between me and a depressed kid? At least I'm out of the grave.
"Why didn't the boy pick up his ice cream?" - Margaret
"Why?" - Depressed boy
"Because he got ran over." - Margaret
"I wish that was me." - Depressed boy
I want to die at a party. This is because nobody can be sad over me.
You have five seconds to kill me. 1... 2... 3... 4... Thank you. I can rest now. WAIT, HOW AM I TALKING?????????????????????
My joke is your life support getting unplugged because my phone is about to die.
What do depression and suicide have in common?
Nothing, they're both hanging.
Real Pokémon.
Anxiety evolved into depression. Depression was the final stage evolution.
Rope: Hey buddy! Want to hang?
Me: Maybe I can hang later...
Cock: Can I have attention from your Dad now?
If an emo and a leaf are in a tree, which one will fall first?
Answer: The leaf. The rope saved the emo.
What do you tell someone who has depression?
Answer: Just hang in there.
I wish my grass was emo, so it would cut itself.
DEPRESSION SPEEDRUN starter-kit:
* Parental issues * Money problems * Genetic likeliness * Horrible friends * Annoying neighbors/classmates * School * Being alive * Actually being a good person for once * Giving a f#ck * War-ridden area * All future options kinda suck