Death jokes

Why is the skeleton sad and alone?

Because he is with nobody.

Where does a suicide bomber go when he dies?

Everywhere.

Bro told me this when he passed away.

I’m “Fading.”

How can one make Death Row a little more fun?

Musical electric chairs.

I have a riddle for you:

10 people are on a boat, but they all die due to a tsunami except the captain.

Then, when he gets home, his wife serves him “penguin meat.”

Once he eats it, he starts crying.

Why?

Shia Mehdi unlived by beard guy looooool 🤨

How do make an adult cry?

Stab him 10000 times until the floors are red with human blood.

During the election campaign of 2012, we heard about Obama, but we thought they said Osama. So I told my friend, "Grab his gun and let's have some fun." So during one of Obama's campaigns, we both shot him to death, which lasted a while.

Then my friend said, "Let's go get piss drunk at Mavericks bar." Then on TV they talked about Obama's death, and everybody but 2 guys cheered. Then guess what, we loaded our guns and lit those 2 guys up like we did to Obama.

Bullets.

I will tell you a story. There was a fruit named Pear who was named Dyck. He one day met his friend Carrot, who was later killed after being stuck into some girl's vagina.

Pear then became very sadistic and no one loved him, and he became mentally fruit-pressed. One day he met a Banana named Harvey Weinstein, and they got married and had children who were all named Minion. Eventually, the rest of his family died, and Pear was left slowly rotting away. His last words were, "I have finally 'peared' the consequences of all my actions."

Why was Jesus not good at Basketball?

Because he died in the Cross 😈

I should probably stop making abortion jokes.

After all, the aborted babies aren't laughing.

What is a skeleton's favorite instrument? (comment below)

What’s the difference between 80 dead babies and a Lambo? I don’t have a Lambo in my garage.

Your mum is so fat when she died the Earth was flat! 😂😂😂😂

Q: What did one dead hooker say to the other dead hooker?

A: Nothing, dead hookers don't talk.

I put a Dalmatian in a washing machine and killed him.

When your cousin dies and everybody thinks you're her.

FUCKING MENT

Why are dead baby jokes always funny?

They never get old.

Say what you want about Paul Walker, but he was a smart guy.

You can tell by the quantity of brain matter on his dashboard.