Death jokes
Don’t cry when you attend my funeral, I was dead long ago so why cry now?
Knock knock.
Orphan: Who's there?
Not your parents.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side!
Hate when my phone dies instead of me :))
What’s the difference between fruit and dead babies? I don’t put fruit in a blender.
What's the best part about dead baby jokes?
They never get old.
I still remember my dad's last words: "Don't worry son, Allah will be pleased."
I had a friend who got shot in the head.
Guess you could say he was...
Blown Away!
What's the best way to cure the hiccups? Suicide.
Why can't you fool an aborted fetus?
Because it wasn't born yesterday.
What kind of bug lives in a graveyard?
A zom-BEE.
What's worse than 10 babies is one dumpster...
1 baby in 10 dumpsters.
Why did Princess Diana cross the road?
She forgot to put her seatbelt on.
Your mum is so old that when I told her to act her age, she died.
If I die, does my depression die with me?
Girl playing outside: "Step on a line and you break your mommy's spine." She then steps on a line and her mother keels over screaming.
Girl playing outside: "Step on a crack and you break daddy's back." She steps on a crack the mailman next door then keels over screaming.
The husband starts celebrating, gets in the car, and starts to drive away.
The son comes outside and steps on a crack.
The dad then dies in a car crash.
What is a necrophiliac's safe word?
"I'm alive!"
1) What was Techno's reaction when he died?
2) Where did all the orphans go?
PS: In case you don't get it, it's a pedophile joke, cuz he is one!
How many dead children does it take to change the light in a basement?
More than ten, apparently.
Why did Technoblade die?
He couldn't respawn in real life!