Death jokes
Life's a bitch, and then you die. I now see what they mean.
Why did the orphan kill himself?
The doctor gave his patient 1 day of life, so he shot him. Then the judge gave him 15 years, so there you go, problem solved.
Little Johnny likes to play with toy guns.
Little Johnny paints them black.
Little Johnny went to a gun store.
Little Johnny made a big mess.
The cemetery people were getting paid.
Why did Stephen die so early?
He didn't use long lasting batteries.
I read the Brothers Grimm books, then I see a black figure reaping about.
I realized someone has died, but I don't do anything about it. I continue to read, and that's when I realized that I was one of the characters, in which at the end, dies.
How do you make an orphan shut up?
You tell his mom.
Hey, yesterday I played with my sister. When I woke up, she was gone.
Do I like playing Russian Roulette? Gun to the head, I'd have to say no.
What is George Floyd's favorite shade of color? Kneeon.
Yo momma so fat she died at 5. Her kids, f
* * *
What did Superman say to Batman?
Nothing, Bruce is dead.
I remember my grandma's last words:
"What are you doing with that axe?"
Steven Hawking's death, you should've gotten a case.
He is dead.
"Where ya going?"
"When I die, hell, but right now, my room."
Why did the skeleton not go to the dance?
Because he had no BODY to go with!
If I worked for Edexcel, I'd give Caroline Flack an A* for her physics experiment.
If you had a friend like me, would you kill me?
“Wills”
Are they a dead giveaway!