Death jokes
Why did I kill?
Because I'm dumb.
What takes knowledge to do and also takes knowledge away?
Looking down the barrel and pulling the trigger. 😂
What did the Emo and the Orphan have in common?
They both hang with the trees.
Why did Technoblade die?
Because God wished him dead for all the orphans he made fun of.
How did the rape victim on a diet lose 21 grams?
She died.
My mom said the only way to cure depression is to do what she does. She's dead.
Technoblade was the second worst thing that happened to orphans.
Guys, they weren’t always orphans!
What's one thing you should never ask a suicidal person? "Are you okay?" because the next day they'll either be dead or have a lot more cuts than they started with.
To those who are dead now, was it fun?
Gwen, we can chat in 2 months. My aunt just died from COVID, and it is taking forever for us to get there to California. I love you, your boyfriend, Prince!
When the school shooter kills five people, and the autistic kid yells, "Heroes never die!"
The only reason he died was because Virgin Media wifi crashed.
Why can't you fool an aborted baby?
Because it wasn't born yesterday.
What was the last thing that went through JFK's mind? A bullet.
I love my family when they're buried alive.
When Stephen Hawking died, he saw the stairway to Heaven.
He thought to himself, "Oh God, this is awkward!"
I heard Microsoft got charged, why?
They couldn’t reboot Stephen Hawking.
Who's the closest family member to Paul Walker?
Answer: The tree.
When Lexa took Clarke out on a date, she walked past the candle shop, and she bought all the candles. After the date, they went back to the Heda's (Commander's) Tower, which is basically a huge candle. "All I wanna do is Candle you!"
I help suicidal people.
BTW verb not adjective.
There are three people on an island. One dies, and the second guy goes to bury them. He comes back with deer meat. The first guy eats it, but the second guy refuses the meal.
When the men return to the mainland, they part ways. The first man goes to eat the deer again at a local restaurant. He takes one bite, then jumps off a bridge.
In heaven, an angel asks him why.
“Well you see,” he answered, “that man was a tribal cannibal. Delicious in my wife’s meat, though.”