Death jokes
My jokes are pretty "bone-arifick," if I say so myself. Hehhehe... Get it?
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
Because he was part of the Lazy Bones team!
Looks like McSkillet McKilledIt.
Why did Princess Diana cross the road?
'Cause she didn't wear a seatbelt.
THERE IS NO AFTERLIFE.
Memes
Did yall know this?
I am a dead baby. -end joke-
Why didn't the chicken cross the road?
He got hit!
Why couldn't the T-rex clap his hands?
Because he's dead.
Stephen Hawking died because he tried downloading a free version of Windows 10.
I don't want to die.
What's a skeleton's favorite instrument?
A tromboner.
What's the funniest thing about being ringside at a UFC fight?
When you look around and all of the spectators are wearing white gowns and fuzzy socks, and you realize you aren't at a UFC event, you're watching your fellow patients fight to the death at a psychiatric facility.
Fruit is like life. You slowly eat it away as it slowly also begins to rot like everyone I’ve known.
What did the first skeleton say to the second skeleton?
Did you know that lots of graves are put in churchyards?
Yeah, they're pretty holey.
What's the difference between an onion and a dead baby?
The baby doesn't cry when you chop it.
Why are graveyards so popular? Because people are always dying to get into them.
What's the difference between your job and a dead prostitute?
Your job still sucks!
Mom, where are we going?
To your grandma's funeral.
Yeah, 'cause I 360 no-scoped that b*tch in the face.
My ex's dad died while she was texting me. She said she had a boyfriend, but I told her I had a dad.