Death jokes
Long live the quee—Oh wait...
My dad died in 9/11. He was the best pilot I have ever seen, though.
My ex's dad died while she was texting me. She said she had a boyfriend, but I told her I had a dad.
The optimistic midget's coffin was half full.
Today, I filmed an unboxing video at my friend's funeral.
His parents weren't too happy.
Putting WiFi in the morgue to enable live streaming.
What do you say to someone being cremated? You urned it!
My grandmother made her passage on a boat. The thing wasn’t the only thing that went down.
Q: What did the late cannibal get when he got to the party?
A: A cold shoulder.
Cars are like bullets; you jump in front of one, and they solve all your problems.
I'll never forget my grandpa's last words:
"You need to park a little closer."
I put the fun in funeral.
On the plus side, Nicola Bulley no longer has a problem with alcohol.
What did the farmer say to the doll?
You death baby doll.
Why did the orphan cross the road?
So he can be hit by a car and be reunited with his parents.
Why did Jesus die at the diving Olympics? Because he can't go through water.
Are you going to jump? Can I jump with you?
How many Sallys does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, she was electrocuted.
What does the school shooter do after shooting all the kids?
Shoot kids in them ;)
When I die, I'll let everyone I kept dear lower my coffin into the ground.
So they can let me down one last time.