Death jokes
I was riding my bike when I saw a man's head in the wheel. It was mine.
I will never forget my grandpa's last words, Hold the ladder!
What do emos do?
Hang.
Can I pin your corpse to a tree?
My grief counselor died. He was so good, I don't even care!
John F. Kennedy may rest in pieces.
My grandfather said that ppl rely on technology too much these days, so I thought about what he said and decided to unplug his life support.
Friend 1: Did you?
Depressed friend 2: I didn't!
Friend one: Swear on your life!
Depressed friend 2: I swear.
A week later friend 2 dropped dead to their utter delight.
A leaf and an emo kid fall from a tree. Which one is gonna land first?
The leaf, because the rope stops the emo kid.
My grandpa said this generation relies too much on tech, so I unplugged his life support.
I once told an orphan to go big or go home. He replied, "I can't get home; it got bombed."
"Kobe is known for fade aways too bad he faded away."
Your dad's hairline was so long that he died.
I stood on the edge of a building and someone yelled, "Do a flip!"..... and I did.
The emo girl got jealous that her phone died and not her.
What's the difference between a dead body and a Lamborghini?
I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.
When's the best day to get the chair? Fry-day.
What would you like as your last meal?
Fried chicken. Extra crispy.
Once my twin brother died from a plane crash. His last words were, "If it's a bomb, I'll give it a 9/11."
The earth used to be flat until your mama was buried.