Death jokes

Can I pin your corpse to a tree?

I once told an orphan to go big or go home. He replied, "I can't get home; it got bombed."

"Kobe is known for fade aways too bad he faded away."

Should I kill the main character's best friends in my book? It's an autobiography.

I was riding my bike when I saw a man's head in the wheel. It was mine.

What do emos do?

Hang.

What would you like as your last meal?

Fried chicken. Extra crispy.

Did you know that Stephen Hawking's death was an accident because he pressed "shut down" instead of "sleep mode?"

What's the difference between a dead body and a Lamborghini?

I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

When's the best day to get the chair? Fry-day.

My grief counselor died. He was so good, I don't even care!

John F. Kennedy may rest in pieces.

My grandfather said that ppl rely on technology too much these days, so I thought about what he said and decided to unplug his life support.

If you killed an orphan's family... oh wait!

Friend 1: Did you?

Depressed friend 2: I didn't!

Friend one: Swear on your life!

Depressed friend 2: I swear.

A week later friend 2 dropped dead to their utter delight.

A leaf and an emo kid fall from a tree. Which one is gonna land first?

The leaf, because the rope stops the emo kid.

My grandpa said this generation relies too much on tech, so I unplugged his life support.

Why did the hedgehog cross the road?

To see his flat-mate.

We thought that my mother died in the best way possible, during her sleep.

But when we did an autopsy on her, we saw she actually died in the worst way possible. During the autopsy.

I was wearing a George Floyd t-shirt, and a person said to me: "That must be a bit tight round the neck."