Death jokes
Knock knock.
Who's there? It's the Grim Reaper.
Grim Reaper who?
The Grim Reaper who is about to come in your house, smoke some weed, drink some Grim Reaper liquor, and then get drunk.
I can’t believe it’s been over a year since Kobe decided he’s too good to wait in traffic.
Whoever said that about me better pray!
Stephen Hawking isn't really dead, he's just rebooting.
Did you know Princess Diana had dandruff?
Yea, they found her “head and shoulders“ on the backseat of her car.
Everyone when we're in the cafeteria singing happy birthday to some random person: "Happy birthday to you..., Happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear
Me in the background: Happy deathday to you..., Happy deathday to you, happy death day dear___, happy death day to you!"
Why did Stephen Hawking die? Because he got bummed too hard in the shower.
What is the difference between me and Paul Walker?
I’ve watched Fast and Furious Seven.
Why can’t orphans have a horse?
Because they run away like their mum did.
I told a diabetic boy to have sweet dreams, and he died the next morning.
What's yellow and can't swim? My mom on Halloween.
How do you get 500 babies in a phone booth?
A blender.
How do you get them out?
A straw.
Luckily, his funeral was a closed casket, sorry, his car blew a gasket.
My dad and I went to the hospital once, and he said he'd be fine and it'd only take a few minutes.
Lying bastard never came out.
Your hairline is so bad that the queen died when looking at it!
How are school shooting victims and school shooting jokes similar? They never get old.
Preventing suicide is best done by committing it.
#RIPBOZO
I tried to make a necrophilia joke, but it was dead in the water.
What hit the ground first, the feather or the depressed kid?
The feather, the rope was stopping the kid.