Death jokes
Where did Suzy go during the bombing?
Everywhere.
How did Michael Jackson die?
Because he danced like a zombie!
I would say something funny, but I would have to dig someone up.
I can't tell what's farther, the Great Wall of China, or how far Paul Walker flew out of his windshield.
The Earth was flat until they buried you.
A man ate a glue stick. It tasted bad. He died. Hahahahah!
Why did the orphan cross the road?
To reunite with his parents.
This 15-year-old girl wanted a cross on her room with a long nail on the end over her bed. Unfortunately, it killed her dad because it fell off the wall.
(Do you get the joke?)
(Her dad was on her, and it fell and killed him.)
Why did the emo kid try [to] high five the tree?
So it can hang him.
If you give a man a match, he is warm for the night, but if you light a man on fire, he will be warm for the rest of his life. :)
Mom died, so I planted mums and forget-me-nots all over her grave site.
What do you call an orphan living with ghosts?
"Him and his dead family." :(
What's the difference between a gay guy and a freezer? The freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.
What do Michelangelo and Kurt Cobain have in common? They both used their brains to paint the walls.
My grandfather says I’m too reliant on technology. I call him a hypocrite and unplug his life support. 😄😆🔥👍
My therapist said to try having a different outlook on life.
I agree. I should have a different outlook on life. Preferably from underground.
I'll turn ya nan into bonemeal.
I would make a joke about Kobe, but I don't think it would fly very well.
What do you call it when you're dead because of that one drink in Panera Bread? Panera dead.
Stephen only died because his wife tripped over the power cord.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
It doesn't matter, he's dead.