Death jokes
You're at a funeral. Your mum says be quiet, so you snigger at the body and say, "Bye forever, bitch."
Why are skeletons not funny? Because they have no humor. 🤣
What's Michael Jackson's favorite hobby?
Nothing because he's dead.
What happened to the chicken after he died? He did not say anything, so I don't know.
Soldiers, there is one thing you can be sure of: You will be at home with your families, in a jar on the mantelpiece.
Small word of advice: Don't wait till next month or next year to do stuff with the people you love, because they may be gone by then. You don't realize, but every second there is someone who dies, and it just could be your loved one.
A guy walks to his friend's house. His friend says, "Where is your girlfriend?" The guy says, "Meet me at the cemetery in a week."
There are times I miss you, that I wish I could remember where I hid your body.
What does a bullet and milk have in common? They both take out your dad.
What's red all over and spins at 100 mps?
Baby in a blender.
What happened after George Floyd went to the drugstore to buy Zicam Extreme Congestion Relief?
George Floyd was able to breathe again.
Why did Ten die?
It was between 9/11.
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
He didn't have the guts.
I had a boyfriend once. He broke up with me because he "wanted to be more alive." I guess it didn't work when he went to my basement.
Mom: I was an orphan once. The kid: Oh, ok, idgaf. Mom: And you're gonna be too! :) The kid: Ok, idgaf- WAIT WHAT THE FU-
Don't leave us hanging, Sayori.
You should never leave a man hanging.
Unless they are still alive.
"If all of these structures break we will all die."
And I said, "Hey, that is not supportive!"
And he said, "It would be breaking news."
What hood do zombies come from?
Dead Ends.
If a pregnant emo kills herself, is it murder-suicide?