Death jokes
If there was a zombie, you would not die because you have no brain.
I will never forget my grandfather's last words:
"Can you hold the ladder correctly, damn it!"
What do you call a suicide bomber under the water?
A bath bomb.
Autoerotic asphyxiation because hanging in there can be hard.
You look good now, but you’d look better hanging from my ceiling. ;)
Memes
Me: Dark humor jokes are like a mother's love.
Orphan: How come?
Me: You wouldn't get it.
Orphan: . . . .
I don't like making Kobe jokes... they always crash and burn.
Did you hear about the cemetery? I heard that people are dying to be there.
"Hey, don’t take my toy! What are you going to tell your parents?"
What did the suicidal guy say to his audience?
What did the suicidal guy say to his audience?
Why did the orphan cross the road? (Not to see his mom or dad.)
Why do people misplace 9/11 with emo kids? They both have a high death count.
What is old, cold, and alone?
An orphan's parents.
If you drop an apple and an emo girl, who falls first?
The apple, because the emo girl hung herself.
Why are cigarettes good for the environment?
They kill people.
I wanted to do something nice for my uncle, so I cleaned out the nice vase that was given at grandma's funeral. It had so much sand, I'm glad to help.
An emo man asked a librarian for a suicide book. She said no because you won't bring it back.
What was the first thing Thanos snapped?
Loki’s neck.
Bro, Kobe Bryant is singing with the basketball team in his helicopter, celebrating right now, I bet.
Oh wait, I forgot.
Bleach solves so many problems: stains, dirty dishes, messes, and overpopulation.