Death Jokes

Why did the orphan jump off of bridge?

So they can reunite with their dead family.

What's the difference between an emo and a banana?

They both hang like apples.

A man comes home, and the wife says, "My ex just died by getting hit by a bus." And the husband said, "I lost my job as a bus driver."

I would go suck some titties, but I’d rather die from being shot than cancer.

Why did the orphan cross the road? (Not to see his mom or dad.)

The image shows four headshots of a young man with a somewhat chubby face. The post begins with a tweet, "#BigGuyTwitter step aside cuz the real big guy is here," followed by a comment from another user asking, "where's your neck Brandon?" and a reply from the first user "idk where's jake at?", which leads to a final comment "rest in peace jake 10/19/16".

A teenager went into a creepy house with his 3 friends. Only 2 came out. Where are the others?

(Getting brutally murdered.)

Yeah man! Life is wonderful! But, when you realize all of the ones you loved were fake.

And when you die, does your online friends notice? How will they notice? Or will they ever notice? Is 13 age too young for dying? Am I just paranoid? I'm scared.

Why do emo kids love dressing up on Halloween so much?

It's their last holiday for them, but at least they're still hanging on...

A hot woman is ready to jump from a bridge and commit suicide when an ugly, stinky homeless man comes up to her and tells her, "Oh baby, you so hot, let's fuck!"

She just yells, "Get the fuck away, you creep!"

He just laughs and says, "Alright, I'll wait down there."

Why did the orphan fall out of a tree?

They thought their parents would catch them.

I asked my mom why dad was so pale and sick. She said, "Shut the fuck up and keep digging!"

Gather 6 friends to play Russian roulette, and one's mind will be blown away.

What you call suicide, I call a failed speedrun attempt.

I still remember the last thing Gaster said before he kicked the bucket, it was, "Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?" (Sans)

What was the first thing that went through the 9/11 victims' heads?

Their ankles.

I asked my friend how long I can be in the sky. He said if you are emo, then forever.

I wanted to do something nice for my uncle, so I cleaned out the nice vase that was given at grandma's funeral. It had so much sand, I'm glad to help.