Death jokes
What was the first thing that went through the 9/11 victims' heads?
Their ankles.
Gather 6 friends to play Russian roulette, and one's mind will be blown away.
What you call suicide, I call a failed speedrun attempt.
Yeah man! Life is wonderful! But, when you realize all of the ones you loved were fake.
And when you die, does your online friends notice? How will they notice? Or will they ever notice? Is 13 age too young for dying? Am I just paranoid? I'm scared.
A hot woman is ready to jump from a bridge and commit suicide when an ugly, stinky homeless man comes up to her and tells her, "Oh baby, you so hot, let's fuck!"
She just yells, "Get the fuck away, you creep!"
He just laughs and says, "Alright, I'll wait down there."
Memes
Why did the orphan fall out of a tree?
They thought their parents would catch them.
Why do emo kids love dressing up on Halloween so much?
It's their last holiday for them, but at least they're still hanging on...
I asked my mom why dad was so pale and sick. She said, "Shut the fuck up and keep digging!"
What were Paul Walker's last words?
I dk probably "WATCH THE FUCKING TREE!"
What is the difference between a dead body and a Lamborghini?
I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.
Why did the orphan cross the road? (Not to see his mom or dad.)
I would go suck some titties, but I’d rather die from being shot than cancer.
A teenager went into a creepy house with his 3 friends. Only 2 came out. Where are the others?
(Getting brutally murdered.)
I asked my friend how long I can be in the sky. He said if you are emo, then forever.
Bro, Kobe Bryant is singing with the basketball team in his helicopter, celebrating right now, I bet.
Oh wait, I forgot.
What was the first thing Thanos snapped?
Loki’s neck.
What's the difference between Paul Walker and a fly? It's the sound they make when they hit the windshield.
What is old, cold, and alone?
An orphan's parents.
Bleach solves so many problems: stains, dirty dishes, messes, and overpopulation.
An emo man asked a librarian for a suicide book. She said no because you won't bring it back.