Death jokes

I don't like making Kobe jokes... they always crash and burn.

What do you call a suicide bomber under the water?

A bath bomb.

Me: Dark humor jokes are like a mother's love.

Orphan: How come?

Me: You wouldn't get it.

Orphan: . . . .

I wanted to do something nice for my uncle, so I cleaned out the nice vase that was given at grandma's funeral. It had so much sand, I'm glad to help.

A teenager went into a creepy house with his 3 friends. Only 2 came out. Where are the others?

(Getting brutally murdered.)

My late grandpa was always popular with women. One day, before he died, I asked him what his secret was. He said, "I inherited a watering hole."

Bewildered, I replied, "What does that have to do with anything?"

"I could easily get anyone wet because I was well endowed."

Bro, Kobe Bryant is singing with the basketball team in his helicopter, celebrating right now, I bet.

Oh wait, I forgot.

What is the difference between a dead body and a Lamborghini?

I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

What is old, cold, and alone?

An orphan's parents.

An emo man asked a librarian for a suicide book. She said no because you won't bring it back.

What's the difference between Paul Walker and a fly? It's the sound they make when they hit the windshield.

Why did the orphan cross the road? (Not to see his mom or dad.)

I asked my friend how long I can be in the sky. He said if you are emo, then forever.

Bleach solves so many problems: stains, dirty dishes, messes, and overpopulation.

What was the first thing Thanos snapped?

Loki’s neck.

I would go suck some titties, but I’d rather die from being shot than cancer.

Autoerotic asphyxiation because hanging in there can be hard.

Gather 6 friends to play Russian roulette, and one's mind will be blown away.

Yeah man! Life is wonderful! But, when you realize all of the ones you loved were fake.

And when you die, does your online friends notice? How will they notice? Or will they ever notice? Is 13 age too young for dying? Am I just paranoid? I'm scared.

What you call suicide, I call a failed speedrun attempt.