Death jokes
What happened to the chicken when he crossed the road? He didn't. He got run over by a truck.
What’s a 9/11 victim’s least favorite song?
Drowning Pool - Bodies.
How do you know when you're near Wacko Jacko's grave? When 'Thriller' is out and about.
Why is it so hard to find people defending suicide in any discussion?
Because they are really committed to their cause.
If a pregnant emo kills herself, is it murder-suicide?
We finally have something in common with Africa. They die of starvation, we die of overeating.
“Life is going swimmingly,”
“Tell that to Whitney Houston.”
What's red and spins really fast?
Kurt Cobain's ceiling fan.
What did Kobe say to the helicopter?
"Don't crash!"
Kobe: "Don't crash!"
Helicopter: *Crashes*
I thought about making a necrophilia joke, but I knew it would be a DOA.
My dad died on 9/11. He was a great pilot.
Why can't Michael Jackson go within 500m of a school zone?
Because he's dead.
Who’s stronger in a relationship, a man or a woman? A woman, because it takes six men to carry him to his grave; it only takes one woman to put him there.
Why can't you kill a hooker?
Because they're dead inside anyway.
If a woman named Susan gets murdered, is it considered a Sue-icide?
Q. What's a necrophiliac's favorite dating site? A. Find a Grave.
If a pregnant emo kills herself, is that murder-suicide or just abortion?
My girlfriend died in Tokyo during a tsunami. I was sad, but my friend told me, "Don't worry, there are plenty more in the ocean."
Leave a man on a plane, and he flies for a day.
Throw a man off a plane, and he flies for the rest of his life.