I got caught fucking a dead body by my family. RIP grandma.
Dead Jokes
What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a dead body?
I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.
What do Christmas decorations and dead people have in common?
They both hang from a tree!
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not your dad.
I could be red, I could be orange, I could be yellow, I could be green, I could be blue, I could be purple, but I would be dead.
What's the difference between a dead baby in my trash can and a discarded sex toy?
...
I'm still trying to think of an answer.
Abortion is a really touchy subject for me. On one hand, there's dead babies! But on the other hand, women get a choice.
What do you call a fish without eyes?
A fsh.
Anonymous 1: Why are you crying?
Anonymous 2: No, buddy, come to my finral.
I didn't steal it. 🌚
Yo momma is so ugly, she gets rejected by dead people.
Vegan Teacher the musical.
Miss Kadie - "Oh no, you poor dead animal!"
Mr. Beast- 🎶 "You're a dumb Communist, Miss Kadie" 🎶
Chandler-🎵 "Yup, you're one high fluting son of a gun" 🎵
Mr. Beast- 🎵 "I just gobbled up a quadruple patty from my restaurant" 🎵
Miss Kadie - 🎵 "Don't hurt animals kids, do you want to be a vegans 'R' us kid?" 🎵
Kids- 🎵 "We've had enough of your problems, Miss Kadie, you're such a commie!"
Miss Kadie - 🎵 "I just want to die because I'm so sad!"
- Miss Kadie jumps off Mr. Beast Burger and commits suicide.
What do you call someone smart and dead?
Stephen Hawking...
How many thots have I bullied?
Three. The rest are dead.
The last thing I said to my dog was,
"Play dead."
What's the best thing about a dead hooker? Refunds.
Osama bin Laden back from the dead!!! 💣💣💣💥💥💥🔥🔥🔥🌇
What do dead people and orphans have in common? They can't see their family.
What does "off-limits" have in common with dead people? They can’t see their family.
I made a website for orphans. It doesn’t have a home page.
What’s the difference between a Lamborghini and a dead body? I don’t have a Lamborghini in my garage.
What is the difference between Iron Man and Iron Woman? One is a superhero and the other is a simple command.
What's black and grey and red all over?
A dead r******.
