Day jokes
Why don’t Mexicans have sex education and driver's education on the same day?
Because the donkey gets tired.
So, one day Kylin Banks was playing football. Then he saw Violet. After he saw her, he got bricked up. Then he ran after her and rubbed his pickle all over her. She was so happy.
Is it me, or was 9/11 too plane? I thought it would be more exciting.
The way you are so ugly your parents even regret the day you were born.
The way you are so black when your mom is bathing you in the dark, she has to put flour in the water to see you.
🤣🤣🤣
Your mama is so fat.
She steps on the scales. She has to return in a couple days to get the results.
Memes
I was with my friend atom the other day. He’s pretty tall . . . Compared to you.
It's a Italy day outside the fields.
My ex broke up with me the day before his birthday. Yeah, he never got to see anything on his birthday. Next thing you know, I'm now in prison.
Why do orphans have 363 days in a year?
Because they have no Father's or Mother's days.
What’s the difference between anal and oral sex? Oral sex makes your day. Anal makes your hole weak.
I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was healthy right up to the day he killed himself.
Q. What do you get when you cross Vince Li with a bus? A. A whole lot of people who wished they'd missed the bus that day.
I had a party the other day. I made sure there were vegan options. They make do or fuck off.
I called my guy friend a cock-sucker the other day. He replied with, "Hey, 20 bucks is 20 bucks."
What do you call a skeleton that does nothing all day?
A lazy bones!
What do you get when you cross a rapper with an accountant?
Someone who COUNTS BARS all day!
Bruh, who likes Dhar Mann nowadays? That shit is ass AF. And it's just legit shit like only nerds that are fatherless would watch that shit.
I pulled a prank on my friend the other day. I painted a portrait of the backrooms blueprints while he was sleeping. Still had some extra space.
My teacher made us watch a movie about the struggles of being an overweight person in this day and age.
It was really heavy on me.
Your hairline so back that back in the day of your hairline, Burger King was called "Burger Prince."