My wife is so fat, I took her to the Macy's Day parade. They attached ropes to her.
Macy's Day Parade
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Explain Bear
Okay, so basically, this dude's wife is super fat. Like, so fat that when he took her to the Macy's Day parade, they used her as a balloon and tied her down with ropes! Get it? You probably don't, because you're a moron.