Dating Jokes

Are you a noose, 'cause I wanna hang out with you?

As we speak now, someone is making arrangements for December with your girlfriend.

Your mom was dating a boy that had a twin brother, but she did it with the wrong one.

Ask someone if they are a rhino. If they say yes, tell them "so you're horny." And if they reply yes again, block them from your life entirely.

So, two people are on a date and the guy says, "Wow, you are so beautiful!"

Then the girl says, "You just want to have sex!"

Then the guy adds, "SMART TO!"

A poster with a picture of a woman named Hannah. The text reads: "Hannah microwaves butterflies in her spare time. #LoveYourImperfections Get 3 days free at match.com/tube match". The poster is in a subway or similar setting. Above the poster, it says: "what the fuck Hannah".

Me, (AHAHAHA IM A JOKE AHAH Criii) Anyone wanna date? Lol.

I went out with this girl the other night. She wore this real slinky number. She especially looked great going down the stairs.

Hey, who thinks Gwen and Aiden are not dating, and who also thinks this dumb girl named "Zre" is being a dummy? And who thinks Gwen belongs with Prince, aka boyfriend?

Who thinks Gwen and dumb bitch prince should *STOP* dating! AND LET THE REAL LOVERS *Gwen and Aiden* RESUME TO *LOVE* SAY ME IN THE COMMENTS SO NOT!!!!!!!!

How did the Iron and Gold start dating?

They met on TINder.

Hey there little mister, I'm dating your sister.

Roblox Brookhaven be like:

"ABC if you wanna be adopted."

"ABC if you wanna be my friend."

"ABC if you wanna be a banker."

"ABC if you wanna rob the bank."

"ABC if you wanna date."

"ABC if you wanna sex."

When you send your girl a dick pic, but she says it's small, so you text back and say:

"Enjoy the little things."

You know why you remind me of a calculator? Because 1+1 equals the two of us.

So, one day Kylin Banks was playing football. Then he saw Violet. After he saw her, he got bricked up. Then he ran after her and rubbed his pickle all over her. She was so happy.

Your hairline is so far back that it dated back to 13 BC.

Your love life.

Are you an abstract manifestation of my childhood traumas and recent memories combined? 'Cause damn, you look like you came out of a dream!

One time, a man got mad at me because I was hitting on his girlfriend. Like come on, man, it was only a couple of bruises!

Best pick up line EVER.

There is an app on your phone called ringer. Go into it. There is a 12 to 15 digit number. Enter that into my phone, my dick will get 12 to 15 inches longer.