Dating jokes
What’s something you can say at a Christian summer camp and during a blind date?
"Good Lord, this is fun!"
Why do women love Chinese food? Because WON TON spelled backward is NOT NOW!
My girlfriend asked me to name all the women I've slept with. I probably should've stopped when I got to her.
My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
When your crush walks in class, but you're homeschooled...
I dated an Indian girl for about six months. She was always Sikhing attention.
In Junior High, we had to do a report on euthanasia. I misunderstood the report and wrote about how I'd really like a Korean girlfriend.
Michael Jackson, who's terrified of adult women, once had a girlfriend, but broke it off with her. When she asked him why, he said, "It's not you, it's me-hee-hee."
What is the best Catholic dating app?
Grinder.
USA: "Never forget 9/11."
Brits: "What happened on the 9th of November?"
Did you hear about the woman who broke up with the man who had a small penis?
When his friends ask how he’s doing, he said, “I wasn’t that into her.”
What dating app do people in Alabama use? Ancestry.com.
I hooked up with my German girlfriend. It was really distracting when she kept saying her age.
Q. What's a necrophiliac's favorite dating site? A. Find a Grave.
I saw names carved into a tree and thought it was romantic. Until I realized how many people bring knives on dates.
I dated a lot of girls before I married my wife. I was living with one of them when I arrived home one day to find her bags packed and next to the door. I asked her, "Baby, what's going on?" She said, "I'm leaving you."
"But why?" I replied.
"Because you're a pedophile!" she answered.
"That's a pretty big word for a six-year-old," I said.
Is your MBTI type INFP? Cause you're so FiNe.
About to go on a date.
But she was late.
So I got some tape.
And eventually punished her with rape.
Been single for a couple of years and then I met this Muslim girl. She soon put the spark back into things.
What made you suddenly lose interest in someone you were pursuing?
When I found out they liked me back. Not interested in someone with poor judgment.