Dating jokes
Are you an archaeologist? Because I’ve got a bone for you to examine.
Do you have a shovel? Because I'm digging that ass.
Are you a pirate? Because I have a lot of seamen waiting for you 😉
Are you a raisin? Because you’re raisin' my dick.
Let's play carpenter. First, we'll get hammered, then I'll nail you.
I used to date this girl only to find out she's a guy.
I guess you can say she had me in a trans.
Woman: I want a man who is 6 feet and 6 inches.
Man: Is 6 feet and 6 inches one thing or two?
Woman: Two, I want a man who is 6 feet and also is 6 inches.
Man: Shit!
What did Bill Cosby say on the second date?
"Hi, nice to meet you."
You know why they call me 007?
0 girls.
0 chances.
7 restraining orders.
How did Rihanna find out Chris Brown was cheating on her?
She found another woman’s lipstick on his knuckles.
What do rocks and girls have in common?
The flat ones get skipped.
You must be from Pearl Harbor, 'cause baby, you're the bomb!
Yo mama so fat, when she went to a dating service, they ended up matching her up with Pittsburgh.
How can a person from Alabama tell that someone is an illegal immigrant?
If they are dating someone that isn't related to them.
Why do people in Alabama always swipe left on Tinder?
Because they aren't family!
Roblox Brookhaven be like:
"ABC if you wanna be adopted."
"ABC if you wanna be my friend."
"ABC if you wanna be a banker."
"ABC if you wanna rob the bank."
"ABC if you wanna date."
"ABC if you wanna sex."
What is the worst thing about dating a blind woman?
Getting her husband's voice just right.
A guy went to a bar and said to a friend that he found a girl on the railroads and said they had the best sex ever.
His friend asked, "Did you get any head?"
The guy said, "No, I couldn't find it."
Hey there little mister, I'm dating your sister.
Whenever your ex says, "You'll never find someone like me," the answer to that is, "That's the point."