Dark Humor
Why did Susie fall off the swing?
She had no arms.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Not Susie.
Most controversial types of matter:
1. Dark matter 2. Anti-matter 3. Black Lives Matter.
There are people who are beautiful, and then there are people whom I won't rape.
How do you make an emo jump?
A cliff.
What's the difference between dark humor and normal humor?
Normal humor is ten babies and one trash can.
Dark humor is one baby and ten trash cans.
Scroll down for explanation.
Ten babies in one trash can; one baby in ten means that the baby was chopped up.
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
Look at me again,
It will be the end of you.
What's big and yellow...?
A bus full of kids.
What's harder than steel?
Michel Jackson in an orphanage.
Why did the mailman die?
'Cause everyone dies.
I visited my new friend in his apartment. He told me to make myself at home.
So I threw him out. I hate having visitors.
Dark humor is like sex: not everybody gets it.
What's common between a feminist and a knife?
They both stay in the kitchen.
A man sees a crying woman by a pond. She is in a wheelchair and has no arms or legs.
He asks her why she is crying, and she answers that she has never been hugged. Feeling pity, he hugs her, then jogs away.
The next day, he finds her crying again, and she says she has never been kissed. The man kisses her and jogs away again.
On the third day, the man sees her crying and asks her thrice. She tells him she has never been fucked. The man picks her up and throws her in the pond, telling her, "You're fucked now!"
The "W" in Africa stands for water.
I don't want to die alone... That is why I am working my way up to become a suicide bomber!
Father heard his children scream,
so he threw them in the stream.
Saying, as he drowned the third,
"Children should be seen, not heard!"
What's the most common thing between Hitler and an emo?
Hitler knows when to kill himself!
Below I meant to say I set the gay person on fire.
In my free time, I like to help blind people.
Verb, not adjective.
What part of a vegetable can’t you eat?
The wheelchair. 😑