Dark Humor

Stop ruining the jokes. It's called "worst jokes ever" for a reason. We all feel bad for orphans, but people like dark humor and joke about everyone, so quit being offended, please.

Why should you put an autistic person in a refrigerator?

Because otherwise you’ll get a rotten vegetable.

(Not meant to be triggering).

You know that at Walmart they have backpacks next to the guns? Well, I thought that it was nice to see the bags next to the school supplies.

Why can’t pedophiles ever win races? Because they are always coming in a little behind.

Everyone becomes happy when they complete the last stage of the game.

But the cancer patients aren't.

When someone tells me to kill myself,

Panic! At The Disco: Don't Threaten Me With A Good Time.

I hate double standards.

Burn a body at a crematorium, you’re “being a respectful friend.” Do it at home and you’re “destroying evidence.”

Santa and Bill Cosby's favorite quote: "Don't be dumb, make sure they're numb, and always use a condom!"

What is George Floyd's pickup line?

You are breathtaking.

I saw names carved into a tree and thought it was romantic. Until I realized how many people bring knives on dates.

My elderly relatives liked to tease me at weddings, saying, “You’ll be next!”

They soon stopped though, once I started doing the same to them at funerals.

What do you call a convict in prison for touching little girls? A boy named Brandon.

Bully: "Hey little Timmy, you look like an ugly rat."

Timmy: "Well, at least I'm a good chef and I'm in a movie, unlike you."

Bully: Dies from embarrassment. 😱

My old platoon sergeant always told me the hardest thing when walking through a field of dead babies was... his cock.

Dead baby jokes never get old...

I was hit on by President Kennedy, too bad I shot him down.

So, I was in the church the other day, raping this woman, when she screamed, 'Please! Think of my children!' I said, 'Ooo, you kinky bitch.'

What's the last thing emos feel before they die? Rope burn.

What's the best thing about Alzheimer's? You can hide your own Easter eggs!!

We all hear cause we cut ourselves, right? I mean, JK.