Is it normal my emo cousins hobby is tying himself to train tracks.
1 minute silence for those who still think thoughts can't kill you.
what is the most dangerous mountain? kill-a-man-jaro
What do cigarettes and hamsters have in common?
They can both be dangerous when you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire.
"Most Deadly Sport" Playing chicken with a Train!
Commander: "Fire a warning shot" Soldier: "Sir, this is a M32 grenade launcher" Commander: "potato, potato, just fire" Soldier: *fires M32 grenade launcher near a pre-school* Commander: "They're trying to run, TAKE THEM DOWN!"
My friend: you ever feel like life is pointless *drives faster* Me: yea- My friend: if you could die with one person who would it be? *speeds up more* Me: H-hey you should slow down! slow down slow down! were about to-
What is the similarity of a bomb and a baby.
When you drop them both, everyone screams.
What does a cigar and a hamster have in common?
Both are completely harmless until you put it in your mouth and light it on fire.
Cristiano Clapnaldo woke up FEELING DANGEROUS against Real Sociedad π₯Άπ₯Ά
- 0 tapins ππ - 0 assists π€©π€© - 3/3 dives π€―π€― - 0 key passes π₯΅π₯΅ - 2 big chances missed π€‘π€‘ - 1/4 dribbles ππ - 2 Offsides π€π€ - 27 claps ππ
Better than Elanga? π₯Άπ₯Ά
How did Billy find out he was in a minefield?
He saw his dads corpse holding a jug of milk.
Last week I was on a plane to Manchester when suddenly the plane was hit by a BALL. I wondered where it came from but I soon realized it was none other than Penaldo practicing his free kicks. Shame on you Penaldo for almost killing me!
You know a parana can devour a small child in 30 seconds Any way I lost my job at the aquarium today
What fits neatly into a hole, slides nicely between breasts, and if used wrong could choke someone? A seatbelt.
I got a phone call from a guy labled 'assassin' saying my life will end soon. I seriously doubt that he w-
*gunshot*
what's the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag ones plastic and dangerous to play with the other is to carry groceries.
Gather 6 friends to play Russian roulette and one's mind will be blown away.
i was playing laser tag with my ex, but i (wink) didn't realize i had a real gun
What kind of club is every parent afraid of their kid joining?
The Mikey Jackson club
How do you spell the name of the most dangerous pedophile?
M-I-C-H-A-E-L J-O-S-E-P-H J-A-C-K-S-O-N
Where did Johnny go after he wandered into a minefield?
Everywhere
