Teacher: what comes after C? Me: Ooh! Ooh! C4! Teacher: umm ok... but still what comes after A? Me: AK47!!! Teacher thought: oh hell na Teacher: what comes after x? Me: xplosin 1 sec later bomb goes off idk
What do a condom and a gun have in common? You should never use either one of them
I gave a blind kid a gun and said it was a hair dryer
A man ate a glue stick. It tasted bad. He died.hahahahah
When you are sleeping in class and the shooter sees you then they wake you up and say let’s team up like wtf
*School Shooter Walks In*
That one kid who play Pumpes Up Kicks at max Volume
I am the danger
My friend was in Afghanistan when he saw someone got shot and then they bumbed him know he called them the talkwakers
True fact: school shooters aren’t dangerous to you if your the school shooter
I was hiking once with my girlfriend. Suddenly a huge brown bear was charging at us, really mad. We must have come close to her cubs. Luckily I had my 9mm pistol with me. One shot to my girlfriend's kneecap was all it took. I could walk away at a comfortable pace.
What is more fun than spinning a clown around on a clothes line at 100 miles an hour? Stopping it with a pitchfork.
(Me) Hey bro tell me a joke! (My friend) Your mom *Starts Laughing* (Me) *Fakes laughs* *then points a gun at him* At this moment he knew he fucked up.
Did you hear about the Italian chef who died? He pasta-way
Where is the most dangerous place for a human being to be? In the womb of a woman who wants to abort her unborn baby. 😢
Got kidnapped in Iran Luckily iran
You're more likely to be killed by a cow than by a shark
What do you call a monkey in a mine field? BaBOOM
Student: 503 bricks are on a plane. 1 falls off. How many are left?
Teacher: 502.
Student: How do you put an elephant in a fridge?
Teacher:No you can't fit an elephant in a fridge!!
Student: Just open door, put elephant in, close door.
Student: How do you put a giraffe in the fridge?
Teacher: open door,put giraffe in, close door
Student: no! Open door, take elephant out, put giraffe in, close door.
Student: The Lion King is having a B-day party. All the animals are there, except one. Which one? Teacher: let me guess the lion?
Student: No!The giraffe because He's in a fridge.
Teacher: WOW!
Student: Sally has to get across a large river home to many alligators. They are very dangerous, but Sally swims across safely. How?
Teacher: Sally stepped on the alligators mouth?
Student:The gators are at the party.
Student: But Sally dies anyway. Why?
Teacher:She drowned?!
Student: no! She got hit in the head by a flying brick.
Officer: "Stay back soldiers, minefield!" Soldier: "Let's clear the field!" Officer: "Ok!" *silence*
*explosion*
spongebob: easy now you try first get a jar patrick: *picks up nuke* spongebob: patrick that's a nuke patrick: yes nuke: *boom*
