Cum Jokes

Why are santa's balls so big? because he comes (cums) once a year

What do you call it when an Astartes cum's... torrential downfall?

What is cum's favorite hotel?

The Four Semens.

Squirtle to Bulbasaur: "You kinda cum... like a baka..."

I'm about to cum!

A split image with a dog on the left, saying "I don't wanna get political but" and the same dog on the right, looking at a map with the text "478 million people live in the cum zone" written over the USA. The map also has Canada and Mexico labeled.

💪 💪 🏋️‍♂️ What do you get when you cross a physically disabled gay white male who works out at the gym, who is a bukkake slut, and a physically disabled gay white male who works out at the gym, who is a sex worker?

Cum Junkie.

Took my receipt to the sperm bank so I can get this comeback.

What do condoms and whores have in common?

Answer: There is a lot that comes in every box.

I'm Gay.

I suck his dick with a smile for hours at a time.

Stare at his nutsack while I hold back my cum tonight.

And when he ask me what position I say, "Doggystyle." (And when they ask me what position I say, "Doggystyle.")

But the fact is I can never get off of his fat dick. And all that they can ask is (Ask is, ask is) "I just wanna smack it" (I just wanna smack it)

Here's what the fact is He can put my asshole in a casket (Yuh, yuh, yuh) Asshole in a casket

So you can see I'm cummin' But you won't see me nut. And I'll just keep on suckin', I'm good (Yeah, I'm good)

And if he sucks my glizzy I will become dizzy But it keeps us busy, I'm good (Yeah, I'm good)

I've been twerking for boys for so long I've been flirting with boys for so long

My jaw's been hurting for so, so long it's real So long, it's real, so long, it's real

"Cummy wummy all over my mummy."

Don't you just love wrecking little girl's pussies? Like the tight feeling is just amazing. The great amount [of] ecstasy you feel when you cum and they get all squirmy. It's just the best.