Cum jokes

I diddled for a total of 67 times. I am the ultra Gooner. My cum is everywhere. I am the goon master.

Is your name winter? Because you’ll be cumming soon.

What is long, hard and has cum in it? Cucumber.

What is a 3 letter word that starts with S ends with X and has a vowel? Six.

I have more cum in one testicle than you have in your whole penis.

penis balls cum <3

What's thick, long, hard, and has cum in it?

Cucumber. Lol. I love the way you think.

1, 2, 3, 4, your sis is such a whore,

5, 6, 7, 8, she has cum on her face.

What's the similarity between Christmas stuffing and my penis?

I like them both inside dead animals, because alive animals feel too much like men, and then I'd cum too quick.

Why is Newton not allowed to visit local farms?

The owners know that forces come in pears.

Your mom and dad are never coming back because dad is cumming for another kid.

A) Why don't orphans play Minecraft Online?

Q) Because Technoblade will get their I.P. address and cum to their houses!

Q: How do you stop babies from being conceived through incest?

A: Cum on your cousin's face.

Lily, Amy, Natalie, and Gabriella, it's my birthday tomorrow. Please come if you want to come. If you come to the party, there will be snacks and cake. Ty.

Why did the Puerto Rican American 🇺🇸 🇵🇷 that was a gay male 🇺🇸 🇵🇷 that was born physically challenged not say anything to a group of gay white men that were not physically challenged after they called him a size queen after the Puerto Rican American 🇺🇸 🇵🇷 that was born physically challenged was done taking turns giving them a blowjob and was done taking turns swallowing their sweet cum? 🇺🇸 🇵🇷

Because it was the best meal that he ever had since he has been in prison for 30 years. 🇺🇸 🇵🇷

Roses are red, The forest is bushy, OMG did you just cum in my pussy?

Jack and Jill went up the hill to have a little fun.

Jack got mad and kicked Jill in the ass because she couldn't make him cum.

What’s another name for cumming in a woman?

Loading the dishwasher.

I am Wayde, I like ranga balls, please cum in my ass.

What do you call a fat bitch that eats cum from used condoms? Your mom!

Diddy and Hawk Tuah walk into a bar. Hawk Tuah says, "Spit on that thang!" Only one walks out. 💀