Yo mama so fat, she got arrested for carrying 100 pounds of crack.
Crime Jokes
Why do a pedophile love Halloween?
Free delivery.
Do you know the murderer, The murderer, the murderer, Do you know the murderer, Who lives on Dreary Lane?
Yes, I know the murderer, The muffin man, the murderer, Yes, I know the murderer, Who lives on Dreary Lane?
What do 9/10 people enjoy?
Gang rape.
Why don’t orphans understand the meaning of a family reunion?
Because they’re not wanted, yet maybe they should rob a 🏦 bank ;)
What does RIP stand for on Maddie's head stone?
Raped in Portugal!
My wife said if I rape her again, she would leave me. Why didn't anyone tell me it was that easy?
What was the last thing to go through the terrorist's mind? The detonator.
What did the cop say to the muslim breaking the law?
"That's against th-Allah (read like da-law)."
Michael has canceled his upcoming dates. They were Tommy, age 9, and Bobby, 11.
Why do pedos like to lose races? Because they like to cum on a little behind.
A teacher is teaching a class algebra. Timmy, you've worked out it is AK, but what is 59 minus 12? Timmy shakes his head, not knowing. The teacher asks, "How about AK 49 minus 2?" Timmy replies with um... The teacher becomes frustrated and yells, "What comes after AK, Timmy!?" The white kid at the back stands, shouts 47, and pulls the trigger.
I love me a nice tight pussy. That's why I'm in big trouble with RSPCA.
What's worse than ants down your pants? Michael Jackson.
OK, there are at least 3 pedophiles in your neighborhood.
But there are no pedophiles in my neighborhood; there are only three 10-year-old girls with juicy asses.
What’s the best part of violently raping a sexy 10-year-old girl? Killing the little bitch afterwards.
A man is being sued for raping a deaf girl. The judge, showing his pinky:
"You should be ashamed, man, your conscience is even smaller than that!"
The girl, showing her arm:
"Mhhhmmhmm, mhhmhm!"
Rape victims suck, literally.
Friend: Why did you touch me?
Me: That guy in the corner with no hair, glasses, really nice, white button up shirt, that drives a white van slow by school zones told me to and he would give me hard candy.
I have double standards: burn a body at a crematorium and you're being a respectful friend; do it at home and you're destroying evidence.
