Crime

Crime jokes

What's the difference between Batman and a Black man???

Batman can go out at night without Robin.

Do you know what's in common between a hitman and a photographer?

They all shoot people for a living.

I was in a school shooting a few years ago, 3 people died.

I guess that’s what you get when you’re bad at hide and seek.

Two priests are pulled over by the police. One priest asks the cop what the reason for pulling them over is. The cop says, "We are looking for two child molesters." The priest look at each other and tell the cop they'll do it.

Why is prostitution illegal?

Because when it comes to screwing people and taking their money, the government doesn't want anyone outperforming them.

I had a threesome on an elevator with a monkey and my underage, deaf, & mentally challenged sister...

It was wrong on so many levels.

What's the difference between George Floyd and Joe Biden?

They both talk like they're on fent.

Roses are red, flowers naturally cannot be black.

I heard that your dad's in jail for selling crack!

We're gonna have to kill

no good Jack and Jill.

They’re draining the economy doooown!

They’ve spent our budget on weed

and lube to spill Jack’s seed.

They’ve ruined our wonderful town!

We're gonna have to kill

no good Jack and Jill.

They have no moralityyyy.

They’re spreading degeneracy.

We ain't what we used to be.

We’ve got to kill ol' no good Jack and Jill!

Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water,

but then they stopped at the tippy top to smoke some marijuana.

They went to the store, and got some more, to fetch a “few” more beers.

Next day they came, ran off again, repeat for 24 years.

We’re gonna have to kill

no good Jack and Jill!

They’ve banked off buying boooze!

They’ll drink and sell the price

at the original times thrice.

Corruption wins, the avg. folk’ll loseee.

We’re gonna have to kill

no good Jack and Jill.

Their kids’re in the business tooo!

They’re draining all our banks.

Give 'em well deserved spanks.

We’ve got to kill ol' no good Jack and Jill.

Jack and Jill Netflix and chilled and made a grave mistaake.

What a blunder, there was no rubber, now they’re a house of eeiiight!

A bolt went off, they opened shop to resell their porn and lean.

It all went swell, but for us, well, we’re now an oligarchy!

WE’LL KILL OL' JACK AND JILL!