Crime jokes
What is the difference between Batman and a black man?
Batman can go out at night without Robin.
If a lawyer gives birth to a stillborn baby, is it considered a miscarriage of justice?
What is a victimless crime in the state of Michigan if you are an able-bodied man who is well-endowed, not white, and not a heterosexual male?
A white male who is heterosexual and physically disabled who is sodomized by an able-bodied and well-endowed gay male who is not white inside the men's locker room at the gym.
So I was at a restaurant and I really hit it off with the waitress, so one thing led to another and I'm at her place and she was really nice at the IHOP but when I was there with her she was all like "ahhh! what are you doing!?!?!? how did you get in my house?!?!?" and then she punched me and I'm the one who ended up in prison.
"When I was in jail, my girlfriend abandoned me. I created a fascination with becoming a gynecologist. When I got bailed out, I became a Travis Bickle."
It's not rape if you say "April Fools!"
The time when Michael Jackson came in his pajamas during the trial. Whether or not it was because he saw a 7-year-old boy has yet to be determined.
What do ICE and Mexican drug cartels both have in common?
They both kidnap Canadian women!
ICE and ISIS have similar first syllables. Coincidence? I think not!
When you hear Michael Jackson talk about his "perfect 10," make sure you hide your 10-year-old son.
Q: Why didn't Jeffery Dahmer eat comedians?
A: He thought they tasted funny.
Q. What's Jeffery Dahmer's favorite song?
A. "Pieces of You."
What do you call an orphan with a gun?
(No) home shooter.
Q. What do you call a CEO that's been shot in the head?
A. An ambulance.
What is Jeffrey Dahmer's favorite song?
"Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes."
What's the difference between Batman and a Black man???
Batman can go out at night without Robin.
Do you know what's in common between a hitman and a photographer?
They all shoot people for a living.
What makes an ISIS joke funny?
The execution.
I was in a school shooting a few years ago, 3 people died.
I guess that’s what you get when you’re bad at hide and seek.
What do you call a Portuguese who commits a crime in Las Vegas?
Consensual Rapper 7.