Country jokes
What is China's favorite restaurant?
The Pet Store.
Why do French people eat snails?
Because they don't like fast food.
Penalties. Tap ins. Ghosting. Diving.
Long ago, the four lived together in harmony. Then, everything changed when the Germans attacked. Only Penaldo, master of all four elements, could stop them, but when his country needed him most, he vanished.
Spell "I hod."
What is the poorest country in the world?
Poortugal...
screw global warming
How did the United States become a country? It broke all of its states.
Why did the white girl come back from Africa?
Because there was no water for her to drink. I'm black.
The best part about Poland 🇵🇱 is that the police lights are different.
In America, you fight Ukraine.
In Soviet Russia, you fight Mykraine.
People say that Pakistan is a terrorist nation...
Guys, it's not true, even Osama bin Laden lived there peacefully for 6 years.
Germany does a backflip. America: What is happening?
France: Want a baguette?
USSR: Help!
Why doesn't the orphan have a nationality?
He doesn't have a motherland.
Just because someone is white doesn't mean they are bad.
Sure, white Americans all treat Trump like a deity and are proud of their heritage of enslaving blacks.
But Canadians and Australians don't throw a hissy fit every time they see someone not white, and they don't think Europe is a country.
You are American when you walk into the bathroom, and you are American when you walk out.
But do you know what you are when you're in the bathroom? European.
What's fast and almost got away?
A Mexican jumping the border.
I can’t remember if I already said this or not. I might have already said this. Also, this is a true story.
So, I’m walking into a store in Amish country, and there’s this guy with a bear trap. Then my mom’s friend says, "This guy’s gonna catch some bears." Then the Amish guy stops, looks around, and whispers, “It’s for democrats.”
What did Tennessee?
Same thing that Arkansas did.
The "w" in Africa stands for wealth.
Which country makes me crack the fuck up?
LAUGHghanistan.
My friend Nickiya wanted to know what animal she'd be. I said that she would be a "Ni-cat-a."