Country

Country jokes

Fact

I would make a joke about America... However, the fact it exists is a joke in itself.

Flag

Jerry: What's the best thing about Switzerland?

Charles: I dunno.

Jerry: Well, the flag is a big plus.

American

Why do Americans always win at the shooting Olympics?

Because they train at the best school.

Memes

Snail

Why do French people eat snails?

Because they don't like fast food.

Terrorist

People thought they were going to another country till they saw terrorists were flying the plane.

Iran

Iran: Prepare the FINAL SOLUTION.

Israel: And you'll be telling the whole world, "I-RAN AWAY!"

Tower

Twin Towers

Why can’t the USA play chess?

Because they lost their two towers.

Family

A young boy was talking to his friend about his family:

"My great-grandfather fought against Napoleon, my grandfather fought against the English, my father fought against the Americans, and my uncle against the Argentinians."

The friend replied: "It seems that your family can't get along with anybody!"

Airforce

USS Liberty. Never forget.

It was bombed and destroyed by the Israeli airforce. Thirty-four dead, 171 wounded. The official story says “accident,” yet an American flag was clearly visible on the ship.

Motive: An attempt to cut off our foreign intelligence on Israel? Blame the bombing on an Arab country?

Just imagine if any other nation bombed an American ship...

Restroom

Question: "You're-a-American" when you're not in the restroom and when you come out of the restroom. What are you when you're in the restroom?

Answer: European (You're-a-peein')

Jew

A Middle Eastern man comes to the states to do a stand up show. He starts by saying “2 Jews walk into a bar, NOT IN MY COUNTRY!”

American

You are American when you walk into the bathroom, and you are American when you walk out.

But do you know what you are when you're in the bathroom? European.